College doesn’t always guarantee a well-paying career or happiness in life.

What would you do if you admitted to a coworker that you wished you had gone into the trades instead of college, only to find out that your choice of words offended her?

Would you apologize even though you didn’t mean it that way?

Or would you stand by your comment and wonder what you did wrong?

In the following story, one accountant finds herself doing this exact thing and needs advice.

Here’s what happened.

AITA for Saying I Wish I Had Pursued a Blue Collar Job

I (29F) work as an accountant and have two four-year degrees, both of which I paid for myself with a combination of loans, scholarships, Pell Grants, and cash from working three jobs.

In addition, I donated plasma, participated in research studies for cash, and sometimes ate out of the trash from one of my jobs just to get by.

One of my coworkers (35F) works in marketing, and her husband (38M) works in a machine shop. She earned her degree in her late twenties, and we’ve talked a lot about our different backgrounds.

Recently, we were talking about welders since our company is currently in the process of hiring a few.

I mentioned that I originally wanted to attend trade school to be a welder after high school, but my parents insisted I go the “traditional” four-year college route.

Without realizing it, she offended her coworker.

She asked me to clarify, and I explained that my first degree turned out to be a dead-end, and I ended up with a job I loved that couldn’t pay my bills.

I later went back for accounting, which pays the bills but isn’t something I enjoy.

Honestly, I feel like I would’ve been further ahead if I had pursued a blue-collar job instead of listening to my parents and spending years on a degree I couldn’t use.

What I said offended her, and she told me never to say that to someone who actually works in the trades. She also said that the term “blue collar” is offensive.

For her, this was normal talk.

I was kind of taken aback, because in my family (mostly teachers and lineworkers, although my dad is a pharmacist), “blue collar” was just the standard term we used for someone in the trades.

I never meant it as an insult, and I don’t think the trades are beneath me or easier than what I do.

I just meant that if I had gone to trade school from the beginning, I would’ve potentially had years under my belt at a lucrative job without seven years’ worth of traditional loans and financial stress.

What I said clearly upset her, so I’m wondering if I came across as condescending or elitist without realizing it.

We also work in an industry that is notoriously dismissive of people who work in the trades, so maybe she thought I was speaking from that perspective.

AITA?

Yikes! This might be one of those things that can go either way.

Let’s check out how the folks over at Reddit feel about her use of this phrase.

For this reader, it may depend on the tone.

According to this reader, she might not have liked the trades either.

Here’s a good point.

As this person points out, the coworker may be someone who’s easily offended.

She didn’t say anything wrong.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.