Imagine planning a surprise vacation for just you and your spouse to a location you know they’ll want to visit.

Would you also take into consideration your children and whether or not this is a location they want to visit too?

In this story, one man originally thought it would be a fun surprise for his wife’s birthday if he planned a trip for just the two of them, but things have changed.

Two out of three of his kids are now going on the trip too, and the one child who isn’t going is mad at him.

Let’s see how he got himself into this situation and what he should do to get out of it.

AITA for going on a family trip right after without my daughter who started college?

So I (52M) just got off the phone with my daughter (18F), and I think I made her cry.

I feel bad, but I also don’t understand exactly why. Any advice would be appreciated.

A few months ago, I began planning a surprise trip for my wife’s 50th this October.

I thought it would be a perfect time for a little getaway, as we’ve been raising children together for the past 20 years, and haven’t have much alone time.

My oldest (20F) has been in college for a few years now, and this year my middle child just left the nest for college too.

This leaves just my youngest (15M) at home, and I figured it would be okay to leave him to fend for himself for a bit.

He picked a location he knew his daughter and wife both wanted to visit.

The issue started when I decided where we would be going.

My wife has been wanting to visit Portugal for a long time, and so I thought that would be the natural choice.

But my middle daughter has also expressed a desire to go to Portugal in the past. To the point where her and my wife had discussed taking the trip together.

I figured that going on a trip w/o my daughter would be okay, since this is just a week-long thing between my wife and I.

Now, his son is going on the trip too.

About a week ago, I decided I couldn’t keep the trip a secret anymore, so I told my youngest about it.

He told me that he would not be comfortable staying at home alone for a week, and after some consideration, I decided that it would be okay if he came along too.

I don’t want him to be left alone for so long, and I think it might be nice to get him some travel experience.

I managed to convince him to keep the trip secret from his mother, but not from my oldest.

Now, his older daughter is going on the trip too.

I hadn’t told my oldest prior, because she has a very busy schedule.

However upon learning about the trip, she managed to take the entire week off of work, which is practically a miracle.

I of course said she could come along too, as this is such a rare opportunity.

This, unfortunately, means the only person in the family not coming is my middle daughter, who is the one who really wanted to go to Portugal.

His middle child is devastated.

So I called her, and told her about the trip, I didn’t expect her to take it well, but she took it REALLY not well.

Once I filled her in on all the details, she got really quiet, and I think she started crying before wordlessly hanging up the call.

Afterwards I was worried she was going to tell her mom about the whole incident, which I cannot have. I really want to surprise her with this.

And so to remind my daughter that it’s a secret I messaged her “Good to chat. Again, it’s a surprise so don’t mention to mom! Love you.”

He knows there’s no way for her to go on the trip.

The trip is happening right before her midterms week, and she’s out of state, so there’s really no way she could come along.

I just hope she’ll come to her senses and calm down, as at this point there’s really nothing to do.

I expected more emotional maturity out of her, I guess.

I think she’s being a bit of a spoiled brat, honestly, but I also understand that something like this could really ruin our relationship, and that’s the last thing I want.

What should I do?

He could’ve picked anywhere in the world, but he had to pick the one place his middle child really wanted to go and on a week when she wouldn’t be able to go.

Considering his wife doesn’t know about the surprise trip yet, it’s not too late to change either the location or the travel dates.

Let’s see what advice Reddit has to offer.

She’s NOT a spoiled brat.

This person calls him an idiot.

He should’ve planned a trip somewhere else.

His wife is probably going to be upset that one of her children isn’t there.

If there’s any way possible, he needs to change this trip.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.