When you start dating someone who has children, you can expect that there will be at least some baggage involved.

What would you do if your fiancée’s ex kept trying to cause issues with your relationship because she wants your fiancée back?

That is what the woman in this story is going through, so when her fiancée and his son moved in with her, she didn’t volunteer to move closer to her step-son’s mom.

AITAH for letting my fiancée and his son move in rather than moving to them so his mom can co-parent?

I, (42f), met my fiancé, (42m), a year after my late husband died in a motorcycle accident 6 years ago. We met through a work partnership and live in different states.

Long distance relationships take work.

We’re about 12 hours apart if we drove. Sometimes we take short commuter flights to maximize our time together (we both live near airports).

Our relationship has been mostly long distance but we see each other at least once per month and text and talk constantly if we’re not at work or doing things with friends.

This sounds very healthy.

My fiancé has been an amazing partner and I feel lucky I was able to find love again after tragedy. My fiancée has a son (16m) from a previous relationship.

He broke up with my stepson’s mother when his son was 9. I think he’s great. He’s been supportive of our relationship and he’s very close with his dad. The biggest issue has been his mom.

Ex’s can really cause drama.

His mom is….how can I put this nicely? Bitter.

She and my fiancée have been in and out of court for the last few years. My stepson doesn’t get along with his mother. The few times I’ve met her have been unpleasant due to her hostility towards me.

It seems like nobody likes the ex.

My fiancé’s mother says she was only after his money but it’s not really my business.

A few years back she tried to harass me on social media telling me that I should step aside so my stepson’s parents can be together. She also tried to tell me that he would never marry me just as he never married her.

This lady is just not letting go.

When we got engaged last year, she became enraged and tried to get full custody of my stepson.

It backfired because my stepson didn’t want to live with her and filed with his guardian ad litem to have her custody reduced which was granted.

Custody can be hard.

Since then, he has opted to only visit her for a few hours one Saturday a month. If she brings up his dad, he leaves. He’s required to answer her phone calls but if she tries to guilt or argue with him, he hangs up.

I stay out of all of it as much as I can. It’s between my fiancé, my stepson, and his ex. I just try to show love and be supportive of my fiancé and stepson.

What a great opportunity.

The issue is my fiancé got a long awaited transfer that will allow him to live with me. My fiancé offered my stepson to live with his mom or my fiancé’s sister if he wanted to stay at the same school and stay with his friends.

My stepson opted to move and live with us. He said he can FaceTime his friends and there’s a really good STEM school that’s willing to take him mid school year where I live. The plan for them is to move in the last two weeks of December.

This is no surprise at all.

My stepson’s mom has tried to fight him moving in with us. She’s accused my fiancée of alienating him against her.

My fiancée has documented every interaction and every encouragement he’s given to try and help his son mend things with his mother. The judge signed off on him moving out of state into my home.

Just block and ignore her.

This has set off another wave of harassment from his ex towards me. She’s sent me messages from various accounts on social media telling me I’ve ruined her family and that if I really loved my stepson, I’d move closer to them so they can co-parent.

I complained to my mom but she actually sided with my fiancé’s ex saying she has every right to be upset as her son is moving away.

Mom needs to stay out of it.

My mom suggested that maybe I should consider a temporary living situation closer to them so as not to disrupt my stepson’s routine and to help my fiancée repair his relationship with his mother.

I have never had any real desire to move as I was born and raised in this town and I love it. I also have no desire to give up my home. So, I have to ask if AITAH for not considering moving closer to them given the circumstances?

AITAH?

No, the kid hardly wants to see his mom as it is, so moving closer isn’t going to help that situation. It seems to me that this woman is handling the situation as well as is possible.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about it.

The boy’s mom will never be happy.

The kid decided to move, so no need to change plans.

Everyone who matters is happy.

It is entirely up to her fiancée.

A little distance might help.

They are doing what is best for the child.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.