Imagine having a birthday that’s around the same time as your nieces and nephews birthdays.

If they were having a joint birthday party, would you make it a priority to attend even if it meant canceling your own birthday plans, or would you prioritize your birthday instead?

In this story, one woman is in this exact situation, and she doesn’t want to cancel her birthday plans. She’s wondering if she should anyway.

Let’s read the whole story.

WIBTA for celebrating my own birthday instead of visiting relatives for their birthdays’

I (24) have the misfortune of having a December birthday which means it falls during the hectic mess of the holidays.

This year my partner (25) Jordan and I have planned a weeklong staycation where we call out of work and spend the week together gaming and chill hangouts with friends as we are both burnt out from our jobs.

But she’s not the only one with a birthday in December.

My sister (38) Izzie has 4 kids (7m, 5f, and 2 twins turning 1). Her twins and 5f all have birthdays around the same week as my birthday as well as her Husband.

This morning Izzie sent me a picture of the invite celebrating all of their birthdays (focusing on the twins) the weekend of my staycation.

One thing to note about my sister, she takes occasions like this very seriously (she designed the invite herself on canva).

I try my best to attend the really important ones like Baptisms and Holidays (thanksgiving coming up for example) but the main issue for me is travel.

She wants to prioritize her own birthday.

It would be one thing if they were nearby and I can easily pop in and say hi, but they live about 1.5 hrs in a rural part of the state whereas I live in the city without a car (grown up relying on public transit, never learned to drive srry).

The alternatives for commuting there are either train (4hrs going and back total/ $75-80) or I drive up with my parents who live in the same city as me but they leave on Friday (day of my actual birthday).

I’m seeing my sister this weekend for thanksgiving and I want to tell her that I already have plans with my partner and friends for my birthday, and I don’t plan on changing that as we both specifically called out of work and made plans to relax.

But WIBTA if I told her I’m missing her kids bday to celebrate my own? I already plan on sending gifts for them respectively (birthday and christmas gifts cuz I know what thats like growing up smh) but is there a gentler way I should approach this?

She’s seeing them for Thanksgiving. She could bring gifts for the kids then and tell them she has birthday plans. She shouldn’t be expected to give up her birthday plans for her nieces and nephews.

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this story.

Here’s a suggestion to simply tell her sister she has plans.

Another person suggests lying and telling her she’s working.

Here’s a suggestion to bring birthday presents on Thanksgiving.

And here’s a suggestion of the exact words she could use to tell her sister she’s not going to the party.

It’s okay to prioritize your own birthday.

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