Justice can get complicated when the consequences fall on people who never asked to be involved.

So when guardians uncovered that their disabled niece’s SSI money had been secretly placed into accounts for her sisters’ college fund, they had the legal option to recover it, but at a devastating cost.

And suddenly the line between fairness and collateral damage wasn’t so clear.

Keep reading for the full story.

WIBTA if I sued a child for her college fund?

Three years ago, my partner and I became the guardians of my sister’s daughter Rose (then 19), who has significant intellectual and physical disabilities.

We always wondered why she didn’t have really any of the level of equipment she should have or access to the therapies she was more than eligible for when they were getting SSI for her.

Soon they discovered the troubling answer.

It was found out through her father’s criminal trial that he was stashing all the SSI payments he was getting for Rose into accounts meant for his other two daughters, Dahlia (then 22) and Lily (then 15).

Due to the way that he was doing it, the most that can be done to recuperate this for Rose is for someone acting on Rose’s behalf (i.e., us) to sue for the money in the accounts.

The guardians tried playing nice at first.

We didn’t want to rush to legal action. We tried talking to Dahlia.

She was adamant that she wouldn’t give Rose a dime and claimed “her and Lily’s” money came from other family members.

She said that we just saw an opportunity to be greedy, and she would not be letting us “take her and Lily’s money away” on a “waste.”

They then decided taking this to court would be their best course of action.

We started consulting with lawyers after that.

Lily’s grandmother called us soon after. She doesn’t speak English that well, but she was clearly in a panic.

The family then started putting a ton of pressure on them.

She begged us to not take Lily’s college fund. She said that Lily works very hard in school and “deserves a chance just like Dahlia had.”

More than that, she said Dahlia is dangerous and that this is her only chance to keep Lily and herself distant from Dahlia’s influence now that she’s 18 and the grandmother has had to go into a nursing home.

By the time we were done, we were both crying. I felt horrible.

This all had the potential to impact the kids in a detrimental way.

Lily would be applying to colleges now. She’s ignorant of all of this because both Dahlia and the grandmother admit they worked hard for her to know as little as possible.

If we do this and win, she will be forced to drop out of college and go straight to living with Dahlia—something nobody wants. It would crash her future.

I’m starting to doubt if this is the right thing to do.

But regardless, her partner thought it was still the right thing to do.

My partner reminded me that even though it is sad for Lily, this is not their money to be doing this with. Just because Dahlia got to use it doesn’t mean that should just continue.

This is Rose’s money. Not only is it illegal what they’re doing, Rose was forced to suffer for years with substandard care.

Rose deserves to get that money back.

He’s right on that, but I’m just not sure.

They think through all the other possibilities.

If Dahlia did use it for her college, how much could actually even be in there to fight for?

Maybe enough to pay for Lily’s college, but after all the legal fees were taken out, would there even be that much to help Rose?

It might be better to just leave it at this point.

Now her partner is upset with her too.

My partner is accusing me of giving up after one sob story and holding a stranger over our niece.

I’m not. I’m just not sure.

It would be ruining Lily’s life and may not even help Rose in the end.

Is this really the right thing to do?

What a hard situation.

Redditors chime in with their thoughts.

This commenter has some follow-up questions.

Hiring a lawyer may end up being more trouble than it’s worth.

With situations like these, it’s impossible to make everyone happy.

It’s time to have an honest conversation with the lawyers.

Maybe some problems don’t have just one right answer.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.