Boundaries in relationships matter, especially when respect seems one-sided.

Imagine your partner accepted an invitation to a party you weren’t invited to, then ignored your texts and came home in another person’s car at sunrise.

How would you feel? Would you brush it off as harmless fun?

Or would you see it as a serious betrayal that cannot be undone?

In the following story, one man ends up in this very predicament and chooses the latter.

Here’s what happened.

AITAH for breaking up with and kicking my girlfriend out because she went to an afterparty without me?

I [24m] and my girlfriend [23f, Anne] began dating in college.

Last week, Anne invited me to her co-worker’s (Joe’s) party. I had heard a lot about him in the past, and he and she really seemed to have a lot in common, especially with their taste in music.

Apparently, he was an amateur musician with a fairly successful YouTube channel. Joe initially invited only Anne, but when she asked him if I could tag along, he said it was fine.

He had a great time until the end.

The party was on Saturday evening. It was a fun party with about 30 people, held at a restaurant Joe had rented out. Towards the end, though, I wandered into Anne’s little discussion group, and I immediately got the feeling that nobody really wanted me there, most of all Anne.

It was her, Joe, and a few other people. Thinking that I was just imagining things, I hung around and listened to Joe basically boast about himself the whole time. A little while later, I wandered off to get myself a drink and chat with a few other people.

Eventually the time to leave came around, and I went to find Anne again. Joe approached me at that point and said that he was having an afterparty over at his house. I was going to refuse, but then he said, “Sorry man but only Anne is invited” while clapping me on the shoulder.

This is where Anne really messed up.

I first told him not to touch me, and then said she was not going. He informed me that she had already accepted the invitation.

I texted Anne immediately to ask where she was. She responded, “Sorry, I’m on the way to Joe’s place. I’ll see you tomorrow. Love you!”

I asked if she knew I wasn’t invited, and she then left me on read. Texts after that were all ignored.

Understandably, he was upset and unable to sleep.

I drove home furious.

I stayed up all night, and finally, Anne walked in the door at 5:42 a.m. I knew because I was by the window watching. I recognized the car as Joe’s and the driver as Joe. Nobody else was in the car. Anne waved to him cutely and laughed at something he said.

Anne came inside and seemed surprised to see me still up. At that point, I flatly told her that we were done and that she had the rest of the day to move out. Anne initially seemed confused, but then I told her that she could just move in with Joe.

As she moved out, she tried guilt-tripping him.

She rolled her eyes and said nothing happened. She gave me this spiel about my insecurities and imagination. I said it didn’t matter. After this back-and-forth arguing, Anne finally relented and sarcastically thanked me for wasting “the best years of [her] life.”

Anne finally moved out yesterday, and it was pretty dramatic. She said she loved me and that I was throwing away everything over a party.

Just wondering if I’m wrong, because I feel like I’m getting gaslighted.

AITA?

Eek! That sounds like a hurtful situation.

Let’s see what the people over at Reddit think about what happened.

According to this comment, there was a clear lack of respect.

Here’s how this reader would’ve approached it.

For this reader, her actions were very suspicious.

This person would never leave their partner like that.

That takes a lot of nerve! He made the right decision and should move on with his life.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.