Speaking a second language is a great skill to have, and it often surprises people when they learn that you can do it.

What would you do if you spoke pretty good Russian, and so did your girlfriend’s parents, but you never told them because it just never came up in conversation?

That is what happened to the guy in this story, so when they finally found out that he spoke Russian, they got upset that he never told them.

I can see both sides of this, honestly. He clearly didn’t do anything intentionally wrong, but I can see why the family is surprised. Read through the story and see what you think.

AITA for not telling my GF’s parents that I speak their language for almost 3 years because they didn’t ask?

My girlfriend’s parents speak Russian. I also speak Russian.

Speaking multiple languages is a great skill to have.

Nothing about me would hint at that. My great grandpa picked it up as a POW, gave it on to his children and so did they.

I took a Russian course ages ago to make the most out of my random rudimentary Russian and just kept listening to and watching Russian content now and then and kept it at what I would say is a decent conversational level.

His ability to speak Russian just hasn’t come up.

My English is much better and my French and Italian are better as well. Therefore, there is never any reason to show that off. Never thought much of it.

I met my girlfriend and she has Russian roots, but doesn’t speak Russian. It never was a topic. Her parents are native Russian speakers but also speak perfect German, which is my native language. You couldn’t tell they weren’t born here.

No issues so far.

Those two do, however, have some short comments, back-and-forths in Russian sometimes. Nothing delicate, nothing the rest of us wouldn’t be allowed to hear.

We always speak German and it’s no issue for anyone. Their upbringing is almost never a topic apart from some funny anecdotes here and there about life as a kid back then. Nothing deep.

The other day a family friend of them, also Russian, came by. Nice evening as always.

I bet they were shocked.

As older generations sometimes do, they were mocking my generation in a light hearted banter joking kind of way. The friend at one point said something about how much tougher they are compared to us.

In an equally joking banter kind of way (100% that was the tone, I am certain I didn’t overstep on accident) I said, not literally, what would best be described as “Well, *****, I hope you’re not scared to put your money where your mouth is.” In Russian.

Honestly, I can see why they would be surprised, but not upset.

Shocked silence. Rough language is normal, they wouldn’t be offended over a bit of banter, promise.

Later my GF said that they were really disturbed that I was fluent in Russian (wouldn’t say that I am but that’s besides the point) and just left them in the dark about it.

Thing is, they never asked. It was never a topic. They knew my great grandpa was a POW in Siberia. I told them that when it was actually the topic.

You would think that it would come up at some point, though.

And we joked about it because some of the mother’s family were locked up there at about the same time aswell. “Haha, they were cellmates” kinda thing. But the language thing never came up. And I just didn’t think much about it?

Nothing of any gravity ever happened in Russian in the household. Half their family doesn’t speak it. We all speak German to each other. I don’t see how this matters?

They are likely worried that they might have said something they shouldn’t have.

I wasn’t eavesdropping either, they never shared a secret in Russian while I was there. I would have said something if that was the case but it only ever was some random talk.

So, now they are cross because apparently I kept a major secret from them. I am confused because nobody cared about that before, it wouldn’t have changed a thing.

This really doesn’t seem like a big deal. Hopefully, it will all just blow over.

We understood each other fine and still do. My GF is stressed because she can see both sides but also thinks the drama is annoying and pointless.

Am I guilty of anything?

AITA?

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While it does seem odd that it never came up, even to his girlfriend, it doesn’t seem like a big deal. The family will likely get over it quickly.

Read on to see what the people in the comments have to say.

There is no doubt that it is weird.

Here is someone who says he was out of line.

This commenter says it is weird and secretive.

What did he and his girlfriend even talk about?

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a brother who is upset his parents bought his recovering sister a brand-new car but wouldn’t help him out with a used one.

It is really weird.

It is hard to imagine how or why this never came up in three years. He never even mentioned it in passing when they started speaking Russian? That seems intentional to me.