‘I am not the type of mom to write emails, but I felt I had to in this case.’ Mom Stands Up For Daughter Not Wanting Her Spanish Teacher To Alter Her Name
by Trisha Leigh
Parents are known for sticking up for their kids, and it’s true that part of being a good one is having your child’s back.
Part of it, though, is knowing when to let them learn tough lessons or deal with hard situations on their own – but OP decided that could wait.
Her daughter has a unique(ish) name and really dislikes anyone shortening it or using a nickname. She corrects people when they try and generally gets her way.
My daughter, Alexandra (14F), hates any shortened version of her name. This has gone on since she was about 10. The family respects it and she’s pretty good about advocating for herself should someone call her Lexi, Alex, etc.
She also hates when people get her name wrong and just wants to be called Alexandra.
In middle school, her Spanish teacher tried using the Spanish version of her name but the daughter asked her to stop and she did.
She took Spanish in middle school. The teacher wanted to call all students by the Spanish version of their name (provided there was one). So, she tried to call Alexandra, Alejandra.
Alexandra corrected her and the teacher respected it. She had the same teacher all 3 years of middle school, so it wasn’t an issue.
In high school, the teacher did not want to listen to the girl’s wishes, insisting that being called by a Spanish name was part of the learning experience in her class.
Now, she’s in high school and is still taking Spanish. Once again, the new teacher announced if a student had a Spanish version of their name, she’d call them that. So, she called Alexandra, Alejandra.
Alexandra corrected her but the teacher ignored her. My daughter came home upset after the second week.
Eventually OP stepped in, asking the teacher to respect her daughter’s wishes, and that was the end of it.
I am not the type of mom to write emails, but I felt I had to in this case.
If matters, this teacher is not Hispanic herself, so this isn’t a pronunciation issue. Her argument is if these kids ever went to a Spanish speaking country, they’d be called by that name.
I found this excuse a little weak as the middle school Spanish teacher actually was Hispanic who had come here from a Spanish speaking country and she respected Alexandra’s wishes.
The teacher tried to dig her heels in, but I said if it wasn’t that big a deal in her eyes that she calls her Alejandra, why is it such a big deal to just call her Alexandra? Eventually, she gave in. Alexandra confirmed that her teacher is calling her by her proper name.
Her husband, though, thinks she made a mountain out of a molehill and their daughter should be able to let it go.
My husband feels I blew this out of proportion and Alexandra could’ve sucked it up for a year (the school has 3 different Spanish teachers, so odds are she could get another one her sophomore year).
Who is right? Is anyone wrong? Reddit is weighing in!
The top comment says OP was right to have her daughter’s back.
This commenter worried there might be some retribution coming up.
And this person agrees there could be some inevitable blowback.
Regardless of the reason, most people feel it is not a big deal.
They don’t really understand why the teacher dug her heels in to begin with.
I think this kiddo is probably going to need to learn how to loosen up.
But there’s really no reason for the teacher to die on this hill.