This is a pretty harsh thing to say, but maybe some people aren’t cut out to be parents.

I know, I know, it’s harsh…but I might be right…

Which brings us to today’s story from Reddit.

Is this person wrong for what they said to their sister about her family?

They started by saying that their sister always wanted a big family…

AITA for telling my sister it’s her own fault her family is a mess because she wanted to adopt?

“My sister “Lucy” (38) has always wanted a big family.

She and her husband “Tom” (40), had their son “Logan” (now 9), but due to complications Lucy couldn’t have more kids.

Lucy was devastated.

About three years ago, she and Tom decided to adopt. Tom never outright said he didn’t want to go through with it, but it was clear to see he didn’t care one way or the other and just wanted Lucy happy.

Logan said he didn’t want a sibling. Lucy brushed over all these concerns with the “they’ll get on board eventually” attitude.

And the boy they adopted has a lot of problems.

Long story short, they were eventually matched with boy, “Jack”, who is now 11.

Lucy said they all bonded, but Jack had behavioural issues and whenever I saw them, I picked up on the fact that over time Tom seemed to be getting less and less keen, and many times when it was just adults he commented on his worry that Jack had latent issues because of his traumatic past.

Lucy adored Jack and rubbished these concerns.

I brought up Tom’s hesitation but Lucy said it was just taking longer for him to bond.

Things have gone from bad to worse.

They officially adopted Jack about a year ago, and since then things have fallen apart.

Jack’s behaviour has either got a lot worse or Lucy wasn’t speaking about it as much before, but it’s clear Tom is at his wit’s end.

According to Lucy he works late constantly and whenever Jack has a tantrum he helps Lucy calm him down, and then takes Logan and leaves the house.

Logan now can’t stand Jack and won’t play with him which causes more issues, and he’s started to act out.

He spent his last school holiday with my family and is set to spend Christmas with us again because even the family therapist says it’s good for him to have some space.

It’s a sad time.

Having seen this all unfold has been heartbreaking.

Tom and Logan look more miserable every time I see them and though Lucy would never admit it, she does too.

Whenever I speak to her she talks about how hard it is but always has Tom and Logan at fault. She has never taken any accountability for the fact that she didn’t listen to anyone’s concerns.

She called me a couple of days ago to discuss plans for Christmas and when Tom would be dropping Logan off at my home. She again started ranting about Tom has basically shut down at home with her and Jack and how she thinks he’s going to leave.

She was calling him every name in the book and then started saying she was disappointed that Logan doesn’t love Jack and she can’t believe she raised a bully.

I lost it.

They decided to tell their sister what they really thought.

I told her the really bully was her, she bullied her family into adoption as a form of wish fulfilment and Tom shouldn’t have indulged her but most of the blame falls on her for destroying her family.

She screamed and cried and eventually called me evil and hung up.

My parents are now saying I was an ******* for telling her that even though we all think it, but I think she needed to hear it, and stop blaming her own child for being unhappy living in the chaos she created.”

Here’s how people reacted.

This person said they’re NTA and asked a question.

Another reader said it seems like Lucy wasn’t being realistic.

This Reddit user said Lucy and Tom are in the wrong here.

This person said they’re NTA but the damage is done.

And one reader said this situation sounds UNREAL.

Sometimes, the truth hurts…

And this sounds like one of those times!

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.