It’s a difficult thing to speak up when you feel everyone around you is laughing at you.

Even if it’s about safety.

This girl did just that.

AITA for yelling to be let out of the car when my boyfriend’s dad turned on the one feature I asked him not to?

I spent last night with my boyfriend’s family, we’d gone out to dinner and his dad was gonna drive.

So my boyfriend, me, his parents, and his brother all squeezed into his dad’s car and we went to the restaurant. I had a few drinks and his dad had two, since he was gonna drive.

She explains the key element to the story: she works in the industry itself!

But on the way back his dad started asking me “you work on self driving cars, yeah?” (I do, I’m a systems engineer and have job hopped between a handful of autonomy companies.)

He started asking me how I liked his Tesla and I joked “just fine as long as you’re the one driving it!” And he asked me what I thought about FSD which he’d just bought.

Then the the dad started pushing buttons, but none in the car yet.

He asked if he should turn it on. I said “not with me in the car” and he then laughed and asked how I was still so scared when I work with this stuff everyday.

I was like “Uhh it’s because I…” But stopped when he pulled over and literally started turning it on.

I was like “I’m not kidding, let me out of the car if you’re gonna do this” and my boyfriend’s dad and brother started laughing at me, and my boyfriend still wasn’t saying anything.

Tensions were rising, and the dad kept pushing. She tried to get out.

His dad was like “It’ll be fine” and I reached over my boyfriend’s little brother and tried the door handle which was locked.

I was getting mad, and probably more so because I was tipsy, and I yelled at him “Let me the F out”

My boyfriend started trying to tell me to calm down because I was drunk and I told him that it didn’t matter, I’d be outta here sober or drunk.

He told me to stop cussing in front of his little brother, and I told him to tell his dad to cut his **** out and I wouldn’t have anything to cuss over.

At this point things had calmed down. But only at her frightened and upset insistence.

His dad was like “fine, I didn’t realize it’d be suuuch a big deal” and drove home normally, but things have been tense as hell.

We got back to his house and he was mad at me for “overreacting” the first time I met his family all together.

I got angry and was like “I’m not the one who decided to do the ONE THING that I said I’m not comfortable with in the car, just after I asked him not to, to laugh at me.”

She tried to explain herself in terms that the dad might understand.

He said that his dad used the car a lot, and it was fine, and I asked him (since we’re both rock climbers) would he ever get on a route with his carabiner that doesn’t lock? What if someone says they do it all the time and it’s fine?

He was like “absolutely not, but that’s different” and I was like “it’s literally not, just like we don’t know any climbers who’d do that ****, nobody in my field that I know would stay in that car.

She knew that alcohol had a part to play in heightened tensions, but she even had that next-day clarity.

He got mad and told me to go to sleep, I was drunk.

But honestly today I woke up sober and I stand by what I did, like I wasn’t comfortable with what was happening and my boyfriend’s family all laughed and started trying to do the one thing I said no to?

Like whatever that thing is, it’s messed up.

AITA for yelling at my boyfriend’s dad to let me out of the car?

Sometimes you know when a situation isn’t right.

And it’s in those moments that speaking up for yourself, even and especially when others won’t, matters the most.

Folks in the comments had some things to say about the matter!

One person was completely on board with the NTA rating.

This commenter put themselves in the girl’s shoes.

One person was pretty baffled by the whole encounter, especially given her field of expertise.

A fellow professional in the same field even chimed in to agree!

We’re glad everyone’s safe, and hope the relationship smoothed out.

But that was not cool!

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