February 26, 2024 at 10:37 pm

Her Boyfriend’s Family Invited Her On A Trip, But She Declined Because They “Don’t Like Her”

by Trisha Leigh

Source: Reddit/AITA

One of the most freeing moments in life is realizing that not everyone has to like you, and in fact, some people just won’t.

And that’s okay.

OP is one of those people who got comfortable with that fact, and so doesn’t hold it against her boyfriend’s family that they don’t like her.

I really don’t see the problem here but my boyfriend is perturbed so I’m trying to see if I’m losing it.

My boyfriend Dan and I have been together for about a year. We live in a big city while Dan is from the country so he doesn’t see his family that often.

However, I have met them several times, and they don’t like me. That’s fine, I’m not overly keen on them either. We just have nothing in common.

I can see them cringing when I talk and they make snide comments about me wanting to stay in a hotel if I visit with Dan, etc..

She doesn’t really like them either.

I want to be clear, I don’t have any problem with this.

We are all civil and can have a pleasant time over a weekend or whatever, and it really is fine that I’m not their ideal in law, they’re not mine either.

But the facts are the facts.

When her boyfriend said his sister wanted to invited her on a family girl’s weekend, OP said she wouldn’t be going.

So the other night Dan and I were having dinner with a friend of mine, and Dan mentioned his sister wanted my number so that she could invite me to a girl’s weekend with her, Dan’s mother, and Dan’s SIL.

I said he could give her my number but I’m not going to go on the trip, but I would like to be polite and tell her myself and thank her for the invitation.

My friend asked why I wouldn’t go and I said because Dan’s family doesn’t like me and I’m not going to ruin their weekend and mine by going on the trip.

He was offended at her frank assessment of the situation.

Dan balked at this and asked why I would say something like that. I said because it’s true. Dan didn’t deny this, just said that was a crass thing to say and they invited me so I should go. I said absolutely not.

Dan dropped the idea of me going (still thinks I should but knows he won’t win that battle) but is still saying that I shouldn’t have been so blunt in saying they don’t like me, that it was an inappropriate thing to say and paints them in a bad light.

I don’t think it does at all. It’s not a crime to not like people, and you don’t choose your in laws, what are the odds you actually like them? We’re all civil and that’s what counts.

Dan is still upset about it, and I don’t really see why he’s so offended.

And no, it’s not OP being insecure.

They make disparaging remarks about the way I dress, the car I drive, and my cosmetic surgery, to my face.

They ask me inappropriate personal questions, they complain about me to Dan (he told me this).

They don’t like me. I’m not imagining it. They don’t.

So, does Reddit think she should keep trying to like them and vice versa? Let’s find out!

The top comment says all of this could make their relationship difficult.

Source: Reddit/AITA

This person agrees an apology would be necessary before moving forward.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Some people don’t get it, because they do like their inlaws.

Source: Reddit/AITA

But most people realize all relationships are not sunshine and roses.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Most agree life is too short to tamp down your true self.

Source: Reddit/AITA

Not everyone has to like you.

You can still get along.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.