Being a first time parent is stressful to the max.

And it only adds fuel to the fire when people ignore your boundaries thinking they are helping.

This woman took to Reddit to share her story.

I have been with my husband for 3 and a half years and married just over 1 year.

This past November we had our first child.

My husband is an only child and his father was never in the picture. Him and his mom have never really been close.

The parents of the newborn set boundaries with both of their mothers.

Now for a little back story, we are both at odds with my MIL and it all started less than 24 hours after I had my son.

My husband and I told both my MIL and my mother that we did not want our son’s birth turned into a photo op. People taking pictures of me have always made me uncomfortable.

My son had some complications immediately after he was born and he was rushed to the NICU.

After anxiously waiting, the parents were able to meet their newborn.

I wasn’t able to see him for roughly 9 hours.

Once I was allowed to go into the NICU my husband went with me as this was the first time I was officially meeting my newborn son.

Immediately the mother in law broke the one rule set in place.

Next thing I know I look up and see my MIL using this opportunity as a photo op.

I WAS FUMING.

These were not the first pictures I wanted of my son or of my husband and I with our son.

The next morning my MIL decided she wanted to come back and see our son who is now safe and in our room. I am running on maybe 2 hours of sleep, but still said it was okay for her to come.

Once she was there I didn’t really interact with her. I was just trying to rest.

Being that it was her husband’s mother, she let him handle confronting her.

After she left she ended up calling my husband. This is when he decided to call her out on the photo op and how she completely violated a boundary that we clearly set.

Her response floored me.

She began yelling at my husband saying that I hate her, that I don’t like her and I never have. That I am so hateful towards her.

She said her reasoning for taking the pictures was because she thought that we would want to remember that moment and to her it wasn’t a big deal and she didn’t see the point of getting upset.

The couple decided that more boundaries were needed.

Once all this happened I decided I needed to distance myself from her and focus on my new family. My husband agreed with doing this as well.

Fast forward to about a week and a half ago. My husband and son had been sick for over a week. I was out doing errands and getting groceries.

MIL asked me multiple times if I wanted anything from Sams Club.

I would constantly tell her “no, but thank you.”

She was doing the same to my husband and he would also respond “no we are good thanks”.

After finally calming the house down, an unexpected visitor wakes everyone up.

I return home and my son was screaming. He hadn’t slept all day.

We all decided to try to nap. My husband finally falls asleep and I finally get my son to fall asleep.

About 10 minutes later there is a knock on my door. My dog goes flying and barking her head off waking up my son.

Once again, the woman set a firm boundary.

I answer the door and say “why are you here?”

She says I wanted to bring you a rotisserie chicken, a trash can, and laundry detergent.

I told her we already said we didn’t want anything and to not show up at our house unannounced and that next time she tries to give us random crap I will immediately return it to her as we don’t want anything from her.

The mother in law once again did not take it well.

She got angry and said “she will never come over or speak to us again” and slammed the door.

AITA?

Reddit users overall felt the new mother wasn’t in the wrong but that she should give some grace to her mother in law.

One person offered an experiment in communication.

Another reader called the mother in law “well intentioned.”

This person had a great way to sum it all up. Keep firm boundaries but don’t completely expel the mother in law from their lives.

Best of luck to you, Mama Bear!

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.