Buying a home on your own is a big accomplishment, especially if you do it without help.

How would you react if you bought a new home and your parents assumed you’d let your sibling move in one day?

Would you kindly oblige? Or would you stand your ground and make it clear that it’s not your responsibility?

In today’s story, a woman buys a home on her own, and her mother is upset because she won’t let her brother move in after their parents are gone. Let’s learn more.

AITA for telling my parents that I won’t look after my brother when anything happens to them?

I (F35) recently bought a house by myself for the first time, after saving like crazy for three years and then selling my flat in the city.

The house is nothing fancy but it has three bedrooms, a back garden, and space for my dogs to run around. I’m really hoping that this will be my forever home.

I know that I’m very fortunate to be able to do this, especially as a single woman on her own. But I’ve also worked incredibly hard to get here. Lots of late nights at work, side gigs, and climbing the ladder where I’ve been able to.

Siblings can be as different as night and day.

My younger brother, Jack (M33) is yet to have a full-time job in his adult life and still lives with our parents. He and I get along really well and I love him to pieces, but I’ve been concerned for a long time about his lack of motivation to do anything in life.

He used to struggle badly with his mental health and I’ve always been there to support him (including financially at times). But he’s been doing okay for a few years now and still has no interest in trying to find a job or start a career.

He and my parents came over to see the house for the first time recently. While my mum and I were making dinner in the kitchen, she remarked how nice and spacious the house is. I thought she meant for the dogs, so I agreed with her.

You should never assume someone will pick up where you leave off.

She then said, “It’s so great that your dad and I know there’s a place for Jack when we’re not around anymore.” I just stared and her for a second, processing what she had said.

And then, without really thinking, I blurted out, “Jack’s not coming to live with me. Ever.”

My mum thought I was joking at first but I clarified what I meant – I love my brother, but I’m not interested in taking over the role that my parents currently play.

Don’t take advantage of someone else’s hard work.

I don’t want him sitting on my sofa, playing video games and rotting away for the rest of our lives. My home is mine and I’ve worked hard to be able to create this space for myself.

My mum was very upset with me and claimed that I was being selfish because I had a “helping hand” in buying my first flat, which allowed me to eventually buy this house.

(For context, the “helping hand” was the settlement I received after a workplace accident at age 19.) She also said that there is no point in buying a house with three bedrooms if I’m planning to live alone forever.

We finished making dinner and then managed to eat the meal without saying anything else about it.

Words can cut deep.

My parents and Jack went home but I then got a call from my dad later on that night, saying that my mother was “beside herself” over thoughts of what would happen to Jack when both of them are gone.

He said that I was being a bad big sister and that family is the most important thing in the world, so I should do my part to look after Jack when he’s been so vulnerable in the past.

I won’t lie, what he said did get to me. I love my brother, and I do have the extra space.

AITA?

Well, it’s her home, so it’s her choice.

Let’s see what the folks at Reddit have to say about this story.

This person feels strongly about their opinion.

This is so true!

This is an example of someone who dealt with a similar situation.

This person offers a bit of advice.

Wow! She’s definitely in the right. The brother should get a job.

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