When A Neighbor Didn’t Pick Up His Dog’s Mess, Another Neighbor Started Collecting It To Get Smelly Revenge
by Jayne Elliott
Dog poop bags were created for a reason.
Unfortunately, not all dog owners use them.
In today’s story, one neighbor gets revenge on another neighbor who doesn’t pick up after his dog.
Let’s see how the story plays out…
Don’t let your dog crap on other people’s property in my neighborhood. You’ll be sorry.
Not long after I had moved into my house, I got a dog.
About a year later, a new neighbor moved on to our street and he also had a dog.
Everything seemed fine to me for about seven-ish months, and then I noticed that the older woman across the street had hand made little signs on sticks stuck into the ground along the front of her lawn saying, “Please don’t let your dog poop in my yard”. I thought it was pretty funny and chalked it up to her being “a cranky old lady”.
OP noticed another dog’s dog poop in OP’s yard.
Not long after that I was cleaning dog poop in my own yard – I had a great designated patch of grass on the opposite side of the driveway ideal for this – when I scooped a poop that seemed larger than most of my dog’s.
I figured maybe I had given too many treats. Idk. Didn’t think much of it.
A week later, I was doing my daily poop scooping again when I noticed ANOTHER really large pile of mess only this time there was a bunch of corn kernels in it so I instantly knew this was definitely not my dog’s crap.
I was livid!
OP rethought the “dog poop” signs.
Then I remembered the cranky old lady’s signs. Maybe she wasn’t just cranky and old after all. Or at the very least, justifiably so.
I decided I would keep a much closer eye on what was going on in my neighborhood (I pretty much keep to myself and don’t bother anyone) from now on.
OP found out what dog was responsible.
One day I’m washing dishes at the sink and out the window I see a dog, unleashed, come running into my back yard!
I’m watching, trying to rinse and dry my hands because my dog is flipping out barking.
As I get to the door, the unknown dog squats and starts dropping bombs.
I flew outside and was about to start yelling at the dog when I saw the owner standing at the end of my driveway watching! I was absolutely astounded.
OP shared a play by play of the conversation with the dog owner…
I said “Hey! Your dog just dumped in my yard ?!?! Wth???”.
He responded with “yeah”.
I said “Well you need to clean that up. Now”.
He looks around and pats his pockets and says, “I don’t have anything to put it in.”
So I asked why he hadn’t brought a baggie along like a normal, courteous person.
To which he shrugged and said, “Do you have one I can use?”
OP told the dog’s owner to go get a dog poop bag.
Nope. Sorry. No can do. I told him he’d have to go get one and come back and that I would wait.
So he did – he walked home, got a bag and when he returned, I was waiting in my driveway.
He cleaned up his dog’s mess and we had no issues for the next few months.
OP noticed the “no poop” signs again.
Towards the end of that spring, I noticed every-right-to-be-cranky old lady had her hand made signs up again.
Uh oh. Not again. Did this guy not learn? And d***, how rude. I decided I would have to, again, keep a lookout.
OP had family over, and it didn’t go well.
About a week and half later over Memorial Day weekend I had some family over. My brother, his wife and my two nieces, ages 4 and 2 came over for a cookout.
The adults were chatting, cooking, having a few drinks while the kids were playing in the backyard by the garden when my 4 year old niece comes over and starts tugging on my brother’s arm.
The smell hit us both instantly. They had been playing in dog mess.
I thought my brother’s wife was going to go ballistic (who could blame her?) and I will tell you that if looks could kill, I would be a cold decomposing body in the ground right now.
OP knew the neighbor’s dog was responsible.
She asked me why WHY would I let them play where my dog’s bathroom is?
I kept trying to tell her I didn’t. We have a designated poop area… I don’t know why there was poop.
But I DID know. Oh boy did I know. It took everything in me not to march down the street and confront dog mess man. I decided it would only start trouble because I didn’t know if I could keep my temper under control.
Needless to say, it ruined the cookout and pretty much the whole visit, and I have never been so embarrassed.
OP decided revenge was the answer.
A week went by, and I was still infuriated. Even more so after stewing in it. I decided that this called for some good old fashioned revenge and I was going to school this a**h*** once and for all.
Spring turned into summer and I let my anger motivate me to be patient. My plan would take some time.
As time passed, I continued my daily poop scooping, only now, instead of disposing of it, I was collecting it in a bucket with a lid. I would leave it out in the hot sun for maximum odor.
After 3 and a half humid, scorching summer months of collecting turds, the final phase of the mission was quickly approaching. I think it’s worth noting that I didn’t see dog s*** man all summer (or his dog), and I wondered if he had finally learned or gotten an earful from one too many neighbors.
Didn’t matter. His fate was sealed.
OP had to get drunk before pulling off the revenge.
I chose a beautiful night. Fall was just around the corner so the temperatures were cooler and humidity lower.
I sat out by the fire and got pretty plastered.
Some time between 2:30-3:00am, I took my bucket of feces and staggered down the street.
I remember standing there for a moment smiling as I imagined dog mess man walking out his door in the morning to the sights and smells that awaited him.
The moment had arrived…
Then I tore off the lid and flung ALLLL that crap everywhere.
It was a LOT of s***.
It was one of the most satisfying things I’ve ever done. I’m probably going to hell but it was worth it.
I drove by his house the next afternoon, and he had hired a clean up crew. He glared at me as I passed.
He was angry, but I was smiling. Elated. That man’s dog never s*** in anyone’s yard again. Ever.
It’s not too much to ask for a dog owner to pick up after his dog. This was certainly some stinky revenge!
Let’s see how Reddit reacted…
This reader expected a different ending…
Another reader thinks OP’s actions were justified.
This reader has a different suggestion for revenge.
Another person praised OP’s revenge.
This reader loved how the story played out despite how long it was.
After what happened with the cookout and the nieces, I can see why this revenge was worth the wait.
If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.
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