Sometimes, families have strong expectations, especially when it comes to helping out during tough times.

So, what would you do if your parents asked you to move back home to help pay off a mortgage, even if living there again meant going back to a toxic environment?

Would you sacrifice your mental health and future plans to help?

Or would you find a way to support them from a distance?

In the following story, one young woman faces this very choice, and her decision isn’t going over well with her family.

Here’s how it played out.

AITA for not moving home to help my parents pay their mortgage

I (21f) am a senior in college.

Recently, my dad got put in ICE.

He financially supported my family.

He and my mom recently bought a new (very expensive) house.

After being detained, my older sister, who lives with them, took on two more jobs and now works seven days a week to help pay for the house.

My sister and I have spoken many times about selling the house, as only she and my mom live there and don’t use half of it.

However, my parents are very against it.

Her mother was not happy about her future plans.

Recently, I spoke with my mom about my plans after college.

I had a job lined up from my internship, and my boyfriend’s (of 3 years) parents agreed to let me stay with them rent-free.

Of course, I would be sending money back to help ease the burden.

My mom was very angry when I told her my plans.

My parents are very traditional immigrants and were against me living with them since we weren’t married, and my dad had yet to meet my boyfriend.

I am very close with my sister, and she has told me my parents had tried convincing her to get me to break up with my boyfriend since he is of a different race.

I knew they were racist and was hesitant to have him meet them.

Here’s why she really doesn’t want to move back home.

My parents wanted me to move back home and work there to pay off their mortgage so my sister could attend grad school.

I love my sister and want her to be able to achieve her dreams.

However, my parents can be very verbally abusive, and I was in a very dark place living with them before college.

I’m scared that once I move back with them they won’t let me go and it would be the same thing all over again.

And this time I would not make it out alive.

AITA?

That’s not a good situation to be in.

Let’s see what advice the fine folks over at Reddit can give her.

As this person points out, the parents need to figure out their living situation.

Here’s something to think about.

Completely agree – it’s not her place to sacrifice her future.

Another great point.

The parents chose an expensive house, and now they must figure out how to pay for it.

Either way, she should not move back home.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.