Sharing a home means adapting to each other’s lifestyles, but some habits can prove harder to reconcile.

When one man moves in with his boyfriend who smokes, only then did he realize just how different their habits – and preferences – truly were. And an easy path forward was nowhere in sight.

Read on for the full story!

AITA for telling my boyfriend to stop smoking inside after previously allowing him to do so?

I (25, m) moved in with my boyfriend (27) after dating for over a year.

He has been a smoker for many years, and he was smoking in his own apartment when I met him.

Up until that point, he had been very tolerant of his boyfriend’s habits, even though they differed from his own.

I must say it has never been a problem for me, and I always accepted it because I viewed it as part of his identity.

I didn’t want him to feel like he had to change in his own home.

When it came time to move in together, there was a choice to be made.

While planning to move in together, he obviously asked me if he could continue smoking inside. After doing it for years, he just couldn’t imagine anything else.

He originally made his choice out of consideration for his partner.

Due to my love for him, I allowed him to continue smoking inside.

Because of this, we picked an apartment without a balcony since he wouldn’t need it, and it was much cheaper.

But soon, he started to have second thoughts.

Now, after a few weeks, I’m starting to regret my decision.

It’s such a difference permanently living in a smoker household compared to just visiting one a few times a week for a few hours.

During those visits, it really never bothered me, but now it’s suddenly starting to.

He finds the issue difficult to ignore.

Even though I’m a non-smoker, the health aspect isn’t what bothers me the most.

It’s more about the smell that my clothes and pretty much everything I own have now.

I definitely underestimated the situation.

He reflects on how different things used to be when the two lived separately.

Previously, when visiting him, it was just a few clothes of mine that carried the smell of cigarettes, but it would fade after a few hours or days once I got home.

So he was honest with his boyfriend, but his boyfriend wasn’t eager to change his habits anytime soon.

I told him about my feelings and asked him if he could maybe smoke outside or at a window from now on.

He got mad and said no since I had previously allowed him to smoke inside, and that was what we agreed on when choosing this apartment.

Now he’s left wondering where they go from here.

I understand his point of view, but I wish he also understood mine.

I love him, and I don’t want such a basic topic to tear us apart.

AITA?

Both smoke and tensions were filling the house more and more by the minute.

What did Reddit think?

This commenter can understand how difficult all of this must be for the couple.

Sometimes it takes being surrounded by something 24/7 to tell how you truly feel about it.

Perhaps there’s still hope that this couple can find a solution.

And if they chose to live separately, it wouldn’t be the end of the world.

Even the strongest love can be stifled under the stench of too much smoke.

Love may mean accepting your partner’s quirks, but everyone has to draw the line somewhere.

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