Your birthday is the one day of the year that should be all about you, without anyone else trying to ruin it

But what would you do if every birthday felt like an afterthought while everyone else’s got special treatment?

Would you quietly accept it year after year?

Or would you finally speak up, even if it ruined the mood?

In the following story, one person finds themselves in this very predicament and decides they won’t let history repeat itself.

Here’s how it happened.

AITA for calling out my mothers behavior on my birthday

It’s currently my 26th birthday, and I had a run-in with my mum.

I woke up and received my birthday wishes from my brother, mum, and dad, which was then followed by my mum asking what I wanted for breakfast because she had made a pancake mixture.

I then said that I just wanted a smoothie.

I had my smoothie at the table with my brother as my dad was doing some garden work and my mum was away.

My mum sat down briefly, and I thanked her for my present and excused myself to go for a swim (it’s summer here)

His birthday never seemed special.

As I returned from my swim with my brother, I went upstairs out of sight of my mum but still in earshot and heard her cry because breakfast was not how she envisioned it to be.

At this point, I was a little fed up.

There is a lot of history with my birthday and a lot of unspoken trauma that I had brought up to my brother but not my parents.

Once, for example, I remember getting leftovers for dinner and two year old cake batter cake.

Which I found quite sad as compared to my parents and other siblings birthdays it really felt like there was less effort applied to my birthday.

Frustrated, he decided to leave for the day.

This has also been a complaint from my mother in the past as the 15 year old me didn’t make a big enough effort for her birthday.

After hearing her cry downstairs, I knew that I had another miserable birthday coming, so I decided to be proactive and pack my bag and start driving to see some friends in a different town to make the most of my birthday.

During this, she made her way upstairs and was hurt about my actions at breakfast as she wanted to have a “Mediterranean breakfast” with everyone at the table.

I told her how I felt about my previous birthday traumas and how it felt like this one was going to be the same, hence why I decided to leave to avoid another sad birthday.

Here’s where they had a falling out.

This hurt her because all she wanted was for me to be happy.

There was maybe a one-hour break in between. I went downstairs to apologize that she felt that way but also that I still feel what I feel.

The whole thing fell on deaf ears, as she then proceeded to tell me that the damage had been done, and there was some back-and-forth.

I tried to be the better person and tried to fix my birthday, but my mum was not having it.

AITA?

Eek! It’s easy to see both sides of this, but the mother sounds a little over the top.

Let’s see what Reddit readers have to say about it.

This person suggests they block her.

Here’s some good advice.

This is also something to think about.

As this comment points out, the mother should’ve planned the breakfast better.

Clearly, her family and friends let her get away with it, which only reinforces the behavior.

If more people let her know that it’s not okay, she might actually change.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.