Helping family in a time of need is second nature to many. But there’s a fine line between offering support and becoming a permanent safety net.

When an aunt inquires about her niece’s progress in finding a new place after staying with them, her niece’s reaction revealed she hadn’t been planning on it anytime soon. The resulting standoff left everyone feeling awkward.

Read on for the full story!

AITA for suggesting my niece finds a new place to stay

My (F36) niece (F18), daughter of my husband’s (M38) younger brother, moved in with us about three months ago, right after she turned 18.

She’d stayed with us for weeks at a time before, and her relationship with her parents is complicated, to say the least.

She was more than happy to welcome her niece in at first.

I had no problem welcoming her to move in with us while she got her footing after properly moving out of her parents’ home.

She graduated last summer and has been working since.

She kind of implied she wanted to find a place of her own, so I assumed that was always the plan.

But the novelty wore off after a while and the aunt began noticing a host of problems.

Anyways, living with her has been… not great?

She was so much tidier when she was just staying for a couple of days or weeks, but now she just sort of leaves her stuff all over.

It’s also not exactly cheap to have a whole other person living here when we’re already on a tight budget.

So she tried to tactfully bring up the conversation of moving, but it didn’t go as planned.

So, yesterday at dinner, I asked if she’d been looking into apartments, roommates, etc., and she made this sad, kicked-puppy face and said she would get right on that.

My husband is mad at me now and is telling me that I need to let her know she can move out on her own time and stay as long as she likes.

That’s not true, though.

She thought this was always part of the plan.

The expectation has always been that she will eventually move out, and I don’t think I did anything wrong by voicing it.

AITA?

The timing may not have been right here, but the intention behind it was still clear.

Let’s see Reddit’s verdict.

The solution here is — you guessed it  — communication.

There are several opportunities to make everyone’s living situation better while the niece looks for somewhere else to stay.

There’s being considerate, and then there’s just plain coddling.

Next time, a quick check-in with the husband first would be best.

Sometimes the hardest part is telling someone when it’s time to go.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.