Imagine being pregnant at the same time as your sister-in-law.

That sounds kind of fantastic because there would be cousins who would be the same age and would hopefully grow up to become friends.

In today’s story, it’s not that idealistic.

One woman shares that her mom was planning to visit her and help out during the birth of her first child.

Then her brother made a suggestion that is making her wonder if she’s selfish.

Let’s read all the details.

AITA for telling my mom she should stay with me postpartum instead of going to see my SIL who is also due soon

So I come from a culture where it is common for the woman’s mother to stay with her and assist her during the end of pregnancy, the birth and the first few weeks after the baby is born.

They stay until she fully recovers and is able to care for the baby unassisted.

My mom has always talked about wanting to do this for me.

This is my first pregnancy so while I am very nervous when I announced it I knew my mom was looking forward to helping me through this phase as I am her only daughter.

My brother and SIL already have one child and she found out she was pregnant with her second and was due soon after me.

She helped out when her SIL had her first child.

My SIL and I have a great relationship and when she had her first child she chose to have it in our home country where her parents are.

She had the same support from her own mother at the time and even extra support from other relatives including my mom.

Although I live in the US I went to visit her and help in any way I could because she felt that was important (I did too).

Her SIL’s parents aren’t going to be able to visit the US when the baby is born.

Since then, she and my brother have moved to the US for career reasons (me, brother and SIL are all citizens but all of our parents live in our home country).

They decided to stay in the US to have their second child.

We are both due soon and unfortunately, her parents had some visa processing issues and cannot come in time for the delivery or shortly after.

My mom however got approved and was planning to stay with me as we had discussed before.

Her brother had an idea.

My brother asked my mom the other day if she could come help my SIL out for the delivery as her parents could not make it.

She is expected to deliver 1-2 weeks after me.

When she told me I (under the assumption I would have already delivered by then) told her that I think it makes sense for her to fly out briefly for the delivery and the initial nights, but that she should come back soon after.

When my SIL heard this she was upset and said that she doesn’t have any family here and my mom was the only family she had.

That she should at least be able to stay for the same 1-2 weeks that she is expected to help me out postpartum before my SIL’s due date.

She defended her reasoning.

I countered by saying that I feel awful that her parents couldn’t make it in time, and that’s why I’m fine with my mother leaving for a few days to help her out.

But that this is my first pregnancy and I always thought my mom would be there in the way that we have always wanted.

That at the very least she has been around the block before.

Now my mom doesn’t know what to do and I think she feels guilty.

She has a good relationship with both me and SIL and doesn’t want to upset anyone.

I don’t know if I’m being selfish here so AITA?

That does sound like a tough situation.

I can see both sides of it. It’s too bad the sister-in-law’s parents aren’t able to make it to the US for the birth.

Let’s see how Reddit responded to this situation.

This person thinks she needs her mom more than her SIL does.

It is her mom after all.

She deserves the same attention and help her SIL got with her first.

She only has one mom, and she should get priority.

Her brother needs to be there for his wife.

Her brother is probably scared.

This family sounds wonderful, though.

If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.