A Generous Neighbor Shared Her Accessible Minivan With A Disabled Community Member, But A Ridesharing Rift Drove A Wedge Between Them
by Chelsea Mize

Reddit/Unsplash
We all know the feeling of giving an inch and someone trying to take a mile.
In this story, one pushy neighbor tried to take thousands of miles.
Let’s read all about it…
AITA for not letting my neighbors borrow my car for a long trip?
I (F29) moved to a new neighborhood almost 2 years ago.
I live alone, no partner or kids but my mom (F80) does live with me part of the year (6-8 months of the year).
I really like this neighborhood and haven’t any issues until now; it’s a very tight knit “community.”
Uh-oh, community in quotes makes me think trouble is brewing.
Neighborhood bbqs at least once a month, the kids all play together after school etc.
My next door neighbors to one side have a severely disabled child.
She is 6, almost 7, and completely non-verbal and wheelchair bound.
They have nurses who help care for her but I know her parents are struggling, understandably so.
Yeah sounds tough. But what does it have to do with OP and her mom?
Her mom had to quit her job and is a full time carer for her and their other older child.
I’ve gotten relatively close to them (the parents) and they are lovely neighbors.
Their older child is respectful and honestly one of the sweetest children in the neighborhood.
For my mom, I bought a minivan and had it customized to have a ramp and wheelchair tie downs so that I can easily transport her and her mobility equipment, usually an ECV or wheelchair, when she’s staying with me.
Sounds like it makes life a lot easier.
The other 4-6 months of the year, when my mom spends time with her sister and friends in our home country, the car sits mostly unused unless I have a reason to move bigger things that won’t fit in my daily driver.
I noticed that the neighbors didn’t have a car suitable for transporting their daughter without taking her out of the wheelchair and fighting to keep all her tubes and wires in place so I offered them the use of my minivan if I wasn’t using it to transport my mom.
So nice, still wondering where the neighborhood feud comes in…
We’ve had an agreement in place that has worked well for us for almost 18 months but now they’ve asked if they can use the car to go on a road trip.
The trip is scheduled to last just over 2 weeks.
The main reason for the trip is to take the kids to Disney World for the first time.
My problem is that my mom is supposed to arrive a couple days after they would leave.
I asked if they could delay the trip by just a few days so I can at least get her from the airport with minimal stress.
They are adamant they leave on the dates they want to, so I said no, I need to be able to comfortably get my mom from the airport.
Reasonable request, especially since it’s her van.
After a 12 hour flight I want her to be comfortable and not have to worry about getting in and out of the car.
They called me selfish and I’ve been ousted by the rest of the community.
I wasn’t invited to the last bbq, nobody says hi or waves back at me on the street anymore.
The neighbor kids that come by to see my dogs and run around the yard with them haven’t been by in almost 2 weeks.
Yikes. Not a beautiful day in this neighborhood.
I tried to text the neighbors but my texts went undelivered so I think they blocked me.
I feel like I’m living in a hostile environment now and it’s so uncomfortable.
Should I just cave and let them take my car?
She’s not living that van life right now, that’s for sure.
What do the comments think?
This poster says, this isn’t a good quote-on-quote community.
One person says, give a neighbor a cup of sugar…
Someone else says NTA even more than I expected.
Another user is like, read the fine print neighbors.
Here’s another vote for don’t cave!
Love thy neighbor but don’t give them your van.
These people are way out of line.
If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.

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