Growing up means learning to speak up for yourself, even when it causes conflict at home.

One teenager took on the weight of planning and funding her Sweet 16… only to have the people closest to her cruelly shut it down.

Read on for the full story.

AITA for telling my mom I deserve a say in my own Sweet 16 after I paid for most of it?

I’m 16F and I’ve basically been raising myself emotionally for years.

My dad was never really around and he passed away, so it’s been just me and my mom (45F).

Simply put, her and her mother have never gotten along.

She loves to constantly remind me that she “put a roof over my head” like that’s some prize-winning achievement for a parent.

Anytime I speak up, she flips it into how she’s the victim and I’m this horrible, ungrateful child.

She also feels ganged up on by other people in her mother’s life.

Since I was little, she’s let her best friend co-parent me, which really just means they’ve treated me like garbage together.

But soon came an event she was actually looking forward to.

Now here’s the kicker: for my Sweet 16 (which is a big deal in my culture), I’ve been saving up from an under-the-table job. I helped to pay for the venue.

I paid for the dress.

I’ve put in way more effort and money than a child should ever have to.

Until her mother and her minions pulled the rug out from under her.

And once everything was almost ready, my mom and her best friend decided they’re going to cancel the whole thing.

No discussion. Just canceled.

She tries sticking up for herself as respectfully as she could, but it still wasn’t enough for her mother.

So I said, “Hey, I helped pay for this, and this is supposed to be MY party, I deserve a say.”

Apparently, that was me having an attitude.

Then came her punishment.

She took my phone, made me delete social media, and said if I want the party so bad, I should pay for everything and “get a real job.”

Except here’s the plot twist — she won’t let me get a work permit, a license, or even go to interviews without a fight.

No matter what she does, she’s always at fault in the eyes of her mother.

I finally got interviews anyway, and now she’s calling me “ungrateful” and saying I’m trying to raise myself like that’s a bad thing.

I feel like no matter what I do, I get punished.

I try to stand up for myself, I get silenced.

I try to work, I’m disrespectful.

I try to take control of my own life, and suddenly I’m the villain?

So yeah. AITA for telling my mom I deserve a say in MY Sweet 16 after I basically paid for it?

She may be young, but she’s already learned that standing up for herself often comes at a cost.

What did Reddit make of all this?

This commenter commiserates about how parents’ shortcomings can make a huge impact on a teen’s life.

This user sees a potential light at the end of the tunnel.

This Redditor calls out the mother’s actions for what they really are.

Her childhood may have been rough, but she still has the rest of her life ahead of her.

Being treated like a burden when she’s pulling more than her weight feels unfair at best and just plain cruel at worst.

Despite everything, this headstrong teenager knows her voice matters — even when the people around her keep trying to silence it.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.