When you get married, for better or for worse that person comes with a whole lot of baggage.

It doesn’t matter how together they seem on the outside, they have families – and likely a very different family dynamic to your own – past experiences and exes, struggles and issues all of their own.

No one is immune to this.

And navigating that baggage is something that you will work on as a couple throughout the rest of your lives – something that can feel a bit clunky at times, as the man in this story found out.

Read on to find out what challenge reared its head to cause turbulence between this guy and his husband.

AITA for telling my husband to stay out of my family business?

I am a 32-year-old man, and am married to Wes, a 34-year-old man.

Unfortunately, my family expected me to marry someone from my community.

When we got married, they cut me off as Wes is white.

I have them blocked on all social media and we have no contact.

Uh-oh. Let’s see how this horrible family situation started to change.

Wes told me that over the past week he has been speaking to my sister. She reached out to him after finding him online and wanted to make amends.

I was quite taken aback that he didn’t tell me when she initially messaged him, and that they had been texting for a week.

She has even introduced her kids – that I didn’t know about – to West.

I told him to stay out of my family business and that this was a massive overstep.

Read on to find out how Wes responded.

He showed that have only exchanged a couple messages over the week, but I am upset that he knew for a week before telling me.

It seems he told me only because she was interested in meeting me, and wanted her kids to meet their cousins in person.

However, Wes said that I never talk about my family and that he just wanted to get to know them for the sake of our kids.

AITA?

This is a really tough situation.

It feels like Wes really is only doing what he thinks is right – and maybe he foresaw a happy situation in which the family could come back together and be happy in the future.

It’s a lovely but naive sentiment – especially when his husband is feeling completely betrayed by his own family.

Let’s see what Reddit had to say about this.

This person thought that Wes should have been much more up front about things.

While others believed it was an innocent, loving mistake.

Meanwhile, this Redditor called out Wes’s mistake from their own experience.

Family dynamics can be really tough to grapple with, and it really seems like Wes was trying to protect his husband by feeling out the situation before presenting him with it.

But it was an error in judgement on his part, and the couple should learn from this and grow stronger as a result.

The husband and kids are what is truly important to both of them, they’re just both coming from slightly different angles.

They are the family that matters after all.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.