Generational values don’t always align neatly, especially around food, tradition, and perceived respect.

Her grandmother had a reputation for feeding everyone until they were sick, so when a young girl turned down dessert, it led to an uncomfortable guilt trip.

You’ll want to read on for this one!

AITA for not being “polite” according to my grandma?

I (14F) am raised in a household that says “if you’re full, don’t eat.”

This comes from the very different attitude around food that her mother grew up with.

My mother (52F) grew up in a pretty old-school home. They don’t agree with her and believe that if you’re somewhere outside, you should always eat everything given to you—even if you throw up.

So the next time they had a meal at her grandmother’s, conflict ensued.

A few weeks ago, I ate with my mom, sister (22F), and uncle (50M) at my grandma’s (76F). My grandmother serves a lot of food, which I end up mostly eating. My mother lets me eat, then go into her living room.

My grandma then told me, “G, come up and eat dessert with us, there’s watermelon—you love it!”

She repeatedly tried to let her grandmother down easy.

I told her I wasn’t hungry, but she kept insisting.

I said, “Meemaw, I’m not hungry anymore, maybe next time.” She kept insisting and insisting. I answered the same thing over and over again.

But her grandmother wouldn’t take no for an answer.

My grandmother got fed up and said, “You just don’t want to admit that you’re way into your phone to the point of not wanting to spend time with us, your family.”

Her mother tries to stand up for her, but she’s having none of it.

I told her that I ate a lot and am full. My mother then stepped in and told her her beliefs.

My grandma answered with, “Well I think it’s rude of her to not want to make me happy, and it’s just a sign she doesn’t love me enough.” My grandpa (76M) stepped in as well and told her to calm down.

Then her grandmother tried to turn everyone else against her.

An hour later, she kept rambling to my sister (who’s kind of on her side) and uncle about how eating food even when you’re not hungry is just human decency.

Now she’s wondering if she really is in the wrong.

I genuinely feel guilty because I know that I tend to think of myself too much, and that could lead to me being rude.

I genuinely think that it’s nothing bad that I didn’t want to eat, because if I ate, I know well I would be having a stomachache for days.

So Reddit, AITA??

She couldn’t eat another bite, but for her grandmother, it was non-negotiable.

What did Reddit think?

No one should have to push their limits just to appease a relative.

Temporarily disappointing her grandma is better than permanently giving herself a disordered relationship with food.

The adults in this situation need to start acting as such.

Overfeeding out of love is one thing, but out of obligation or fear is another.

She listened to her body, but she never expected it would upset someone else so much.

Ultimately, her grandmother’s reaction was more about control than care.

If you liked that post, check out this post about a rude customer who got exactly what they wanted in their pizza.