I can play like 3 basic beats on the drums.

I always wanted to learn more, but the logistics of having a drum kit to practice on without driving everyone around you insane are…tricky.

Judging by this story, though, you can drive everybody insane even if they DO want you drumming around them.

You just have to be really inept.

AITA for quitting my band the way I did?

I’ve been in a band for two years, and this year, 2025, we got a new drummer.

He is, by definition, an egotist.

Because he would spout on and on about ‘I can play anything, I’m a good drummer.’

You can’t have a huge ego and be a drummer.

That’s the lead singer’s job.

Well, for such a prodigy, he struggled to play our songs correctly for months, even though we taught him how.

We had our first gig with him about a week ago, and he messed up on every song.

In an attempt to explain his mistakes to non-musicians reading this, he was drumming as if he didn’t know the setlist or had never heard the songs before.

And no, the other members did not call him out on this – he’s a very ‘alpha male’ type, so the other guys said nothing because he’s their “friend.”

Or else he’ll smash you with his alpha powers.

Being the angry person that I am, I waited 24 hours after the gig to collect myself, before sending him and the band a long, angry, unflinching text.

I made it very clear my issues were purely with him and not the other members, but that he was such a cancer and detriment that I refused to work with him in any capacity.

I went as far as to tell him, “You should give up on music,” because he very clearly isn’t committed to this band despite claiming to be, and he is not nearly as good at drumming as he claims.

I simply refuse to work with someone like that and it became a case of ‘he’s staying, so I’m leaving.’

So, that bridge is pretty burned.

I know I wasn’t nice about it, I’m not saying I was.

This guy turned my hobby and my passion into a joke, OF COURSE I wasn’t going to be nice.

But, did I go too far?

I hate the guy, but telling someone to give up because they aren’t good enough is never a good look.

Here’s what the comments made of this:

There wasn’t a lot of sympathy on this one.

Feels like you were beating the war drum.

There are better ways to do this.

I guess it’s hard to say how bad this is without knowing first hand just HOW insufferable the drummer may have been, but it does seem a little immature in any case.

If you liked this post, check out this story about an employee who got revenge on a co-worker who kept grading their work suspiciously low.