Family fights are about as fun as a water slide into a septic tank.

But we’ve all got to deal with them, don’t we?

And when it comes time to pick sides, get ready to plug your nose…

AITA for not defending my brother to my husband after my brother threatened his business?

I (32F) feel stuck between my husband (34M) and my family, and I don’t know if I handled this the right way.

First let’s talk about the brother.

My brother (30s) has always been the golden child in my mom’s eyes.

He has several kids but barely parents them.

My mom (60s) watches his children constantly while he sleeps, plays video games, or just disappears.

Any time someone brings up how unfair this is, she makes excuses like “he’s just tired” or “he’s doing his best.”

He rarely shows up to help, and everyone is expected to tiptoe around it.

And then there was the fight.

Recently things got worse.

My husband owns his own business and works hard to provide for our family.

After a dumb disagreement with my brother, my brother actually threatened my husband’s business.

Like straight-up said he’d mess with it. Not even in a joking way.

Then, he demanded my husband return the furniture we had bought and given him.

This was stuff we purchased to help him when he was going through a tough time.

It wasn’t a loan. It was a gift.

But suddenly he was acting like we owed him something.

“Screw you, I’ll destroy your business, also give me that couch back,” is a truly weird direction for any conversation to go.

So yeah – my husband got mad.

He made a comment about how my brother doesn’t do anything, never helps with his own kids, and how my mom constantly enables him.

It was honest. Maybe a little harsh, but not inaccurate.

I didn’t say anything.

I didn’t defend my brother because honestly, my husband was right.

I’ve felt that way for years but always kept quiet to avoid drama.

But mom is still rooting for bro.

Later, my mom pulled me aside and told me I should have stood up for my brother.

She said I let my husband “disrespect family” and accused me of changing since I got married.

She made me feel like I betrayed them by not taking my brother’s side.

Now I feel completely torn.

My husband is working hard, doing his part, and constantly getting disrespected.

But my mom acts like I should cover for my brother no matter what.

So, AITA for not defending my brother when my husband called him out?

Let’s see what the comments say:

Many said if there was any side to be on, it was husband’s.

Seems like this was overdue.

Seems like maybe the teams are evenly matched.

Some of the comments seemed weirdly (in my opinion) hostile toward the wife here for not somehow solving the brother problem before now, or not properly standing up for her husband.

She clarified later that she very much did the latter. And the former, I mean…that’s not how families work, y’all.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.