It can be tricky business teaching kids responsibility without coming down with an iron fist.

On the one hand, they should learn there are consequences for their actions, but on the other hand, you can’t expect them to act like adults when they don’t have the same rights or resources as adults.

So you end up in situations like this:

AITA for making my daughters friend take a little responsibility?

My daughter and her friend were having a pillow fight in her bedroom.

The friend picked up a baseball bat and hit my daughters bed with the bat.

My daughters phone was on the bed.

The friend knew the phone was there because put it there.

The baseball destroyed the glass on the phone.

It was a pixel 9.

At the time of writing, used Pixels 9’s are going for around $300 – $500.

They’re still $1000+ new.

I was livid.

She tried to say that she would pay to fix the phone when she gets a job over the summer which at the time was 2 months away.

She was supposed to go without a phone for at least 2 months.

I told the friend that she needed to pay for 1/2 of either getting the phone fixed or a new phone.

She would NOT tell her what happened so I told her if she didn’t I was going to file a small claims suit.

I’m no lawyer, but I don’t think you can sue a minor like that.

The cost to replace the glass was over $300.

The cost to replace the phone with a cheaper Moto phone was $250 so my daughter went with the Moto phone.

Her friend only $100 toward the phone.

Seems like she’s real upset about how much this all costs, huh?

I didn’t really care about the money.

They were both in the wrong.

My daughter got in trouble for it and also had to work for the rest of the phone money but now the friend isn’t allowed to come over and my daughter is t allowed over there.

Am I the [jerk] here?? … For making her friend take some responsibility??

Let’s see what the comments made of this:

You’re ending a friendship over this?

This is probably the MOST sympathetic comment she got:

Why didn’t you talk to her parents?

There’s a lot about this that’s baffling. But here’s a hot tip:

If you don’t want your daughter resenting you when she grows up, maybe don’t destroy her relationships over petty nonsense.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.