Some people try to trap you into a romance, so it’s important to stand your ground.

This one is especially creepy.

Check out how this woman did that after decades of manipulation.

AITA for destroying his painting of me after he gave it to me

I sat for a portrait painting many years ago by a local artist who asked me to. I was happy to at the time.

My feelings about this changed. It was an extremely well-done painting and looked almost exactly like me.

He has painted several other women in similar fashion.

He paints lots of things, and various series of things. (I’m also an artist.)

As I’ve grown older, I realized this portrait was part of a “collection” by this man, of “beautiful women” that he would show off.

For twenty five years he kept offering to ship the painting to me, but never did. I honestly didn’t care if he kept it or not.

His antics go deeper than that.

Oddly, that allowed me to see how over the years he was trying to hold this painting over my head as an object to keep me engaged with him.

But it didn’t really work, because I didn’t want the painting that much. I think he thought I would be extremely excited to have it.

Every time I would see him, he would bring it up and very seriously tell me he was ready to ship it.

And I would be like “Sure, of course I would like to have it if you want to give it to me.”

And he would communicate with me about that up until that point and then stop completely replying.

It began to feel like a game and I wasn’t enjoying it.

Finally, many years later when I was around, he invited me over to “Get the painting” but oops- it still wasn’t quite finished – twenty five years later.

So I go over (brought a friend because I didn’t want him to hang out with him alone), he let me see it, but I’d have to come back a couple days later to get it STILL.

The games end now.

Finally, he gave me the painting and I took it back home (I was traveling, I don’t live where he lives any more).

I thought about how I felt about it, how it made me feel like an object he could toy with, how he’d used this painting to abuse and manipulate me and this painting was the only way he knew how.

So I destroyed it.

He found out because he wanted to display it for a show and I told him I didn’t have it any more.

He was stunned.

We had zero agreement about future availability of his works. I have no regrets.

I’m really glad to know it doesn’t exist any more for others to look at like he’s my owner, or a gatekeeper of me, or to include me in a part of a “collection” of women, or for him to enjoy alone.

Of course, he thinks I’m a jerk, but I don’t. He made me feel tied to this painting after the fact in a way that made me very uncomfortable. Knowing it’s completely destroyed makes me feel at peace.

What do you think?

Here is what folks are saying.

He could do much worse if she let him in her house.

Yes. It’s predatory.

I bet. There is in the music world, too.

She had to stop it.

Blocking is liberating.

I just wished she’d shut him down much earlier.

A lot of this could have been avoided.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.