When you live in a neighborhood you have to expect that you will see your neighbors while they are relaxing in their yard.

What would you do if one neighbor was complaining about her backyard neighbor (a man) because he was in his yard without a shirt on?

That is what happened to the neighbor in this story, so he told her he saw nothing wrong with it, and now she is upset.

AITA for not agreeing with a neighbor about whether another neighbor’s behavior was inappropriate?

I live in an HOA development, and I was out walking my dog yesterday when I stopped to chat with a couple of neighbors, let’s call them Emma and Jane (not real names, obviously).

Having nice neighbors is a real blessing.

They are both moms and their kids were playing in the grass by Emma’s house, which is at the end of a stretch of row homes.

While we were talking, at some point, Emma mentioned another neighbor, let’s call him John, whose house is directly behind hers at the end of another set of row homes. The back sides of each row face each other across several yards of grass.

What’s the problem here?

John recently had a deck installed out back with a hot tub, and Emma was complaining about him hanging out on his deck while shirtless.

She said it’s understandable if he’s in the hot tub, but that it’s “uncomfortable” when he’s just lounging, and they could see him from their back deck (again, yards apart).

I don’t see the issue, this seems very normal.

I didn’t understand the problem and asked her why it’s an issue, since a shirtless guy isn’t generally considered indecent as long as he’s otherwise dressed.

She maintained it was uncomfortable and he just shouldn’t be out shirtless unless he’s using his hot tub, citing “privacy” as a reason, which still didn’t make sense to me.

Wow, this lady sounds like a prude.

I asked if she’d also take issue with a woman in a swimsuit out sunning herself on her own property, and Emma said she would, and wouldn’t want her kids “exposed to that”.

I then pointed out that if they’ve ever been to a beach or water park, they probably already have been, not to mention TV, and it’s harmless, but she cut me off, sharply saying “I don’t want to talk about it anymore”, repeating herself if I tried to say anything, even “Okay”.

This lady sounds weird.

She went inside for a few minutes, leaving me with Jane and the kids, and I was still trying to figure out what the heck I did wrong when Emma came back out.

She said she’d felt awkward and wanted to explain that she’d just “been looking for support” and it’s “how she was raised”, etc.

I told her that I just didn’t get why it was a big deal, since it’s not like John was hurting anyone by being shirtless on his own deck, and maybe, if it makes her so uncomfortable, she could just look away.

Wow, I would try to just drop it at this point.

She tried to suggest that it possibly only bothered her so much because she’s a mother, knowing I don’t have kids, to which I replied, “I’m pretty sure it’s not because you’re a mom, since my mom never got upset about this kind of thing.”

She then returned to “I don’t want to talk about it” and took her kids inside for dinner.

He did nothing wrong.

I’m just not sure if I did something wrong by disagreeing with Emma, and defending John enjoying his new deck how he likes as long as it’s harmless. I did my best to be polite and reasonable, but I’m not great at reading unspoken signals.

If she is so offended, she should put up a fence or plant some shrubs along the property line or something like that.

Let’s see what the people in the comments have to say about it.

Oh, you know this commenter is right.

Why does she even care?

Some people just love being outraged.

Yes, she has the issues.

This commenter things she is looking for support.

She is looking for sympathy, but deserves none.

Thought that was satisfying? Check out what this employee did when their manager refused to pay for their time while they were traveling for business.