Funerals aren’t fun or comfortable for anyone, but sometimes there’s reasons and feelings that might keep someone from attending.

In this story, a man is conflicted on attending the funeral for his girlfriend’s grandfather.

The real question is, is there a moral obligation to attend a funeral for someone you’ve never met?

Let’s get into and find out.

WIBTA For Declining to Attend a Funeral?

One thing to note is that I do not like funerals.

In January my grandfather passed away and I didn’t attend the funeral. Instead, I visited his grave this summer to say my goodbyes.

Fast forward to October, my girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year.

About several months ago I mentioned that I wanted to meet her two remaining grandparents.

This is where the story starts.

Family is important to me and I wanted to get to know them because they are part of her.

For the past six months her mom has been telling us to wait for a “good day” to go over but also saying that the grandfather’s health is declining.

About two months ago there was a good day but her mom and sister decided it was more important for her sister’s boyfriend to meet the grandparents than for me to meet them and two boyfriends would be too much.

About a month ago, there was a gathering at the grandparents house and my girlfriend was told that I couldn’t come because there weren’t enough chairs for an extra person.

It was after that I told my girlfriend that I was starting to feel worried that the first time I meet her grandmother I’ll be some random stranger at her husband’s funeral.

The stress sets in…

Everything about that scenario felt like it was spiking my anxiety.

She said she would communicate that this introduction was really important.

Our time was scheduled for Monday to meet grandpa and grandma, but her mom cancelled suddenly saying grandpa wasn’t well.

Well, yesterday (Tuesday) grandpa passed away.

I want to be there for my girlfriend but I don’t think I want to go to the funeral if I’m asked.

He’s conflicted.

I just feel like there’s something about this family dynamic that is setting off my anxiety and I really hate funerals to begin with.

But I don’t want to be or come across as petty.

If I told my girlfriend I don’t want to be at the funeral, would that be a selfish move?

Let’s see what Reddit users think about this.

This commenter thinks he has a deeper reason for not going.

Another user had a more gentle approach.

While others were pretty straight forward.

Overall, it seems everyone in the comments agreed.

While there’s obviously nothing exciting about a funeral, they’re a part of life and important to many people.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.