Planning a wedding can be a very exciting and enjoyable time for a couple.

But it can also be an immensely stressful and testing time for a couple – and the line between the two is very thin.

So when the woman in this story was seeing her mom plan her wedding of her dreams she was understandable delighted for her – especially since her previous wedding had been very different to what she had wanted.

And when things started not going her way, her daughter was there to help immediately – regardless of whoever’s feelings got hurt.

Read on to find out how a small matter had big repercussions.

AITA for asking my step sister not to officiate our parents wedding?

My step sister’s father and my mother have been together for six years now.

Both of them have been divorced and have two kids of their own (myself, my brother, my step sister and her brother).

Two years ago, my step father proposed to my mother and they have just started planing the wedding – they both want something intimate, just immediate family.

Let’s see how the couples’ previous experiences are affecting the planning.

Now, for context, my mother’s first wedding, while beautiful, was completely orchestrated without her input or opinion.

From the guest list to the food, to her hair and makeup she had no say in it, she wasn’t even able to wear the dress she originally wanted (though that was partially due to the fact she was five months pregnant) but that’s besides the point.

She got to choose absolutely nothing and she does not have good memories surrounding that day.

Due to this, she felt that this wedding would be something she could control and actually make into something she loved, not just something she had to do.

But her determination and enthusiasm doesn’t make wedding planning much easier.

She’s been stressed for a while as both her and my step father work 9-5 jobs in the city and all of us kids are in college states away, some even countries away, and planning around all of our schedules is close to impossible.

Now last month, my step father brought up the fact that my step sister wants to ordain the wedding.

My mother acknowledged the kind gesture but made it clear how uncomfortable it would make her to have anyone but a priest do it, even her own kids.

A month later, my step father shows her a screenshot of a text from my step sister showing a picture of the license she received from the state of Massachusetts to officiate a wedding.

Let’s see how the step-father responded to his daughter getting ordained.

The following text from my step father read, “Awesome sweetie! We’ll get to planning right away!”

My mother immediately felt ill seeing it was clear that my step father had either forgotten their conversation last month, or simply didn’t care about her input enough.

My step father is a good man and loves my mother very much, I do believe he just genuinely forgot the conversation.

But now she would look like the villain in crushing my step sisters dreams of officiating the wedding.

And the situation is having effects beyond just the happy couple.

She brought this matter up to my brother and I today, and we were both immediately displeased and uncomfortable with the idea of my step sister marrying them.

I feel like this takes away from my brother and I, as we’re not even part of the wedding (my mother doesn’t want any of the kids in the wedding).

I want my mother to have a wedding where she will be happy and relaxed, not stressed or uncomfortable because she felt the need to please my step sister and step father.

So she decided to take matters into her own hands.

I explained this to my step sister over the phone and she was very upset about it, knowing how against we were as this is her father’s wedding as well.

Was I in the right to ask her not to do it?

AITA?

It’s clear that this young woman is very protective of her mom, and it’s important to her that her mom gets the wedding that she’s always wanted.

And it’s great that she’s sticking up for her – but the truth is, the conversation with the stepsister should have come from the step-father instead.

That can, of course, only happen when the girl’s mom opens up to her fiancé about how she’s feeling – something that is super important for the health and happiness of her marriage.

Let’s see what folks on Reddit had to say about this.

This person agreed that the conversation should have been between the mom and stepdad, not the two stepsisters.

While others thought that this miscommunication, if not ironed out, could be a negative omen.

Meanwhile, this Redditor pointed out that the stepfather deserved a say in his wedding too.

It’s really nice that the mom is finally getting a chance to get the wedding of her dreams, but the truth is, the resulting special day should be one that the couple have dreamed up together – not just one for her or him alone.

And their lack of teamwork on this is not a good sign. It’s clear that she has trauma, and if he doesn’t fully understand that, things are going to get difficult between the pair of them down the line.

This is about way more than just a wedding officiant, it’s about the honesty and respect that their entire relationship is built on.

This is about their future as a couple.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.