Woman Invites Her Mother To Join Her On A Cruise, But It’s Really Stressful Because Her Mom Changes Her Mind About Going Multiple Times
by Jayne Elliott

Shutterstock/Reddit
Imagine booking a cruise where it wouldn’t cost anymore for two people to travel than one person. Would you enjoy a solo trip, or would you invite someone to join you?
In this story, one woman invites her mom to join her. Unfortunately, her mom changes her mind multiple times about whether or not she actually wants to go on the trip, and with the travel dates quickly approaching, the daughter isn’t sure what to do.
Let’s read the whole story.
AITA for not adding my mum back to a holiday she dropped out of?
I had booked a short holiday package followed by a cruise over a year in advance. Because I’d be paying the same price for the cruise for one or two people, I asked my mum if she wanted to come for free – so she would fly out a few days after me, to stay with me for a night or two, then join for the cruise.
She wasn’t 100% certain because she was anxious about flying transatlantic on her own.
I talked her through the transfers etc and made it as simple for her as possible.
I said I would need a final answer about 4 months before the cruise, as that was the final payment date and any further changes (i.e. taking her off the booking) would charge a fee after that point, but obviously I had to provide accurate information about who was coming on board.
There’s a problem with the hotel arrangements.
The final payment date came and went – she still wasn’t certain because we hadn’t yet booked flights due to prices being high (we were waiting for a sale).
I booked my flights about 2 months before the trip, and she seemed hesitant but booked hers.
The next day I called the hotel to ask if they could add her name on the booking (it’s a very well known resort and this should have been fine) but the call handler said no, she would have to buy the package.
I rang my mum and said that was incorrect advice so I’m going to ask the Facebook community for some advice but worst case scenario, she’d have to get a hotel elsewhere for 1-2 nights.
Her mom wasn’t okay with looking at other hotels.
She panicked and cancelled her flights as it was within 24 hours. She said she wouldn’t risk going and wasn’t prepared to look at other hotels.
I said if she cancels her flights I’ll take that that she’s not coming, because I need to update the booking asap as the fee could go up the closer to the trip.
She accepted that and cancelled anyway, so I removed her from the booking and had to pay a small fine.
She didn’t offer to help or pay the fine.
She wasn’t exactly happy about this last minute change.
I really struggle with plans changing – I also live for my holidays, so this was stressful for me.
It took a lot to get my head around going on my own, but I finally got excited to go solo.
My mum never takes accountability, never apologises, never gives emotional support, and always plays the victim.
Her mom changed her mind AGAIN!
A month before the trip, she says she actually wants to go and is going to ring the resort and cruise to try to sort it out.
She told me this, not asked.
I said I’m not doing anything to help with it.
Of course then she rings me saying they can’t do anything as she’s not the booking owner, and can I ring them.
It seems like no matter what option she chooses, she loses.
I said no, she didn’t give me an answer when I asked, she hasn’t apologised for messing me around, and she didn’t help when I had to remove her from the booking, so she just has to accept she missed the deadline.
She’s upset with me, and I’m mad that I now feel like my holiday is ruined because either I add her back to the booking when I now don’t really want her to go because of how she’s acted, or I don’t, and have to deal with the emotional guilt-tripping.
My stance is to not add her… but does that make me TA?
That’s a tough situation. It’s honestly too bad she ever invited her mom to go on the cruise with her. It would’ve been less stressful that way.
Let’s see what advice Reddit has to offer.
Here’s some advice on what she should tell her mom….over and over again if necessary.

Her mom has to suffer the consequences of her actions.

She’s probably better off traveling solo.

Everyone is on the daughter’s side.

Her mom shouldn’t have said she didn’t want to go if she really wanted to go.
If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.
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