Christmas should be a happy time of year, but so many elements of this holiday are downright pleasant or invoke unpleasant memories.

Read on to see why this person is feeling hurt before Christmas.

AITA for Not Looking Forward to Christmas This Year?

My issue is, my family expects me to come for Christmas Eve, stay over night, and all day Christmas Day. This has been our tradition for as long as I’ve been an adult.

Particularly because I’m single, I think they expect me to go along because they take for granted that I don’t have anywhere better to be.

It’s the same disappointment every year.

And I do want to spend time with my family. It’s just that I wind up kind of hanging around, because I’m not allowed any say in what we do.

Part of it is very understandable. I have a young niece, so that limits some of the things we can watch on TV, or the games we might play. I’m totally okay with that.

It goes beyond those small, necessary compromises. My parents have pretty much told me I’ll never get to host Christmas gathering, despite repeatedly offering/suggesting/asking that I be allowed to host, and cook dinner.

Whenever I suggest a place we might all go to, someone comes up with a reason why we shouldn’t. The answer I get is never “Yes and.” It’s always “No,” or “Eh.”

The one thing I’m allowed to contribute is, the last few years is that I baked cinnamon rolls for breakfast on Christmas day. I do them from scratch.

I’m proud of my skills as a cook, and doing this gives me real joy and a sense I’m contributing.

Now she doesn’t even have that! Or anything else…

But this year, my sister said she wanted something different, and so my mom told me I didn’t need to bake anything.

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t care about the cinnamon rolls. I care that they didn’t really consider asking how I felt. They didn’t consider that it’s something I really look forward to doing for my family.

They didn’t give me a chance for an alternative. I would have been happy to bake something else for breakfast. But I wasn’t even asked. I was just told what was going to happen.

I’ve tried in the past to articulate my desire to contribute something, be it a dish, or a meal or an activity we all enjoy.

Her mom is less than supportive.

When I said to my mom that I really enjoyed cooking us breakfast and would miss not doing rolls or something, she said I was overreacting and should “Keep it light.”

In light of this, I said that I would be coming over later in the day on Christmas. I tried not to get into the “why” too much.

I just said I was wanting to do something different, and do a few things on Christmas Eve I’d enjoying doing. But I worry I’m being petty. That I’m overreacting, and should just be grateful I have somewhere to go, and a family that will have me.

AITA?

Here is what folks are saying.

Great metaphor.

I’d make them for my neighbors!

It doesn’t sound like they deserve this.

It’s good to make things obvious.

You’ve never felt left out, buddy?

Her mom sounds terrible.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.