It’s nice to be recognized if you’re good at something, but to have someone volunteer your services for free without asking you first…

That’s not cool!

In today’s story, a man isn’t too happy about what his wife did on his behalf.

Let’s take a look!

AITA for refusing to help with BIL’s house?

“I’m a pretty handy guy. My dad had a home remodeling business and I worked for him all through high school and college, and even some after that when he was really busy.

My wife (Susan) and I basically renovated our whole house during lockdown.

Yikes…

My wife has a very bad habit of volunteering me to help people without asking me first. We have fought about this in the past and I have told her I will not do it in the future.

My wife sells real estate and she had been looking for a house for her brother Paul and his family. The housing market here is insane so finding something they can afford has been a real challenge.

In late August my wife announced she finally found a place and wanted me to take a look. Susan talks about what a great deal the house is because it “needs a little work”.

It needed more than that…

The house is a mess. There is a ton of work including redoing the kitchen and bathrooms, fixing drywall, and lot more.

I asked him who he was going to get to do the work – thinking I could recommend some guys that used to work with my Dad. Susan and Paul look at each other and then she says that she is sure “the two of you can do it”.

Well, first of all “me and him” would mean “me” as Paul has no home improvement skills at all.

Ummmm, no.

I just said “no way”.

Paul asked me what I meant and I told him that there was a ton of work that needed to be done and I wasn’t signing on for it. I am not spending every weekend for months working on someone else’s house.

Susan and I argue about it but I refuse to budge. Susan says fine – if I won’t help then she and Paul will do it themselves. I should say that while Susan did help with our renovation – particularly things like painting – I did the bulk of the work.

I know my wife and I know she is thinking that I will end up giving in and helping. I warn her that I mean it – I’m not helping. She says she and Paul can do it. Paul buys the house.

You know how this went…

Well, it goes about how I expected – meaning very badly. They had estimated it would take 2 months to make the house livable enough for the family to move in. 6 weeks in and they have made little progress on the meat of the house.

My wife is getting more and more irritated at me. I never bring up the house and I refuse to engage when Susan brings it up. I am taking next week off of work and I told Susan I would take care of our house and kids (typically we split up chores) while I was off.

Now, things are getting ugly.

She hit the roof. She told me that if I was off for a week then I should be helping with her brother’s house. She brought up that they had 2 weeks to make it livable or he was going to have to pay both the mortgage and rent for his apartment – and he can’t afford that.

I replied that I told her from the beginning that I wasn’t helping and I meant it. My wife is now not speaking to me since, according to her, I “don’t like her family”.

This is a hill I am willing to die on. However I know that her brother is the one that is going to get hurt.

AITA for refusing to help?”

Check out what folks had to say on Reddit.

This person chimed in.

Another reader said he’s NTA.

This individual had a lot to say.

Another Reddit user shared their thoughts.

And this person spoke up.

This guy is standing his ground and he’s not about to budge!

If you liked that post, check out this one about an employee that got revenge on HR when they refused to reimburse his travel.