It’s good to have values and stick to them. That makes the world a better place, at least in a small way.

But what if your family wants something that conflicts with those values? Check out why this son is conflicted.

AITA because I don’t want to go a cafe my mum she chose for her birthday

I told my Mum I would take her out for her birthday tomorrow for breakfast as I will be working when her birthday dinner is happening.

I asked her if she wanted for the cafe/restaurant to be a surprise or if she wanted to pick it herself.

This got unexpectedly complicated.

She said she would have a think about it and a couple of minutes later she said she wanted to try out a cafe in our neighbourhood that was quite well known.

I was bit shocked about this as my friend of 16 years who has a disability previously “volunteered” there (illegally) under the guise he would eventually be given a paid position, which in turn never happened.

My Mum knows that I don’t like this cafe for this reason and when I asked why she wanted to go after what happened with ‘John,’ she just said John was silly enough to work there for almost a year unpaid.

I kinda snapped here and said it was horrible that she said that because they were taking advantage of a vulnerable person who at time was also a teen at the time.

But that doesn’t affect mom’s wishes.

I also had heard of other employees who were legally employed not being paid on time and not being paid incorrectly I told my Mum this as well.

I said to her that I don’t feel comfortable going to this cafe and that she can pick anywhere else but I don’t want to spend my money somewhere that doesn’t pay their staff. She said to me that I was being controlling and that she was going to go to the cafe herself tomorrow if I wasn’t going to take her.

I suggested to her that she go another time if she was that insistent on going but because it was her birthday i would really like to take her out for breakfast. She said that the only place she wanted to go was there.

I don’t personally believe I am being controlling but maybe I am? Do you guys have any advice on what to do? Do I just suck it up and go to the cafe to keep my mum happy or am I being reasonable and putting up a boundary?

Here is what folks are saying.

It’s like his mom wants to hurt him. Who does this?!

I think so, too.

I can’t stand this kind of manipulation. What’s behind it?

I agree. Who wants to support a business that does this?

I sort of agree.

Something tells me he won’t treat her to lunch next year.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.