Sometimes relationship arguments aren’t really about the money. They’re about what the money represents.

This groom-to-be found himself in hot water after telling his fiancée he didn’t want to attend her family’s expensive Mother’s Day brunch tradition. The brunch itself costs nearly $50 CAD per person, happens early in the morning, revolves around all-you-can-eat breakfast food he doesn’t even like, and comes from a family culture that eats out far more often than his own does. To him, it feels like paying a premium price for an experience he’ll mostly endure rather than enjoy.

The problem is that his fiancée doesn’t see it as “just brunch.” She sees it as showing up for her mother, participating in family traditions, and supporting the people who will eventually become his family too.

Now he’s wondering if offering flowers or a gift instead should be enough… while Reddit debates whether this is really about waffles at all.

AITA for not wanting to attend my Fiancé Mothers Brunch on Mothers Day?

AITA My fiancé, 30F wants me, 29M, to show up for brunch on Mother’s Day to support her mom for a $48 Cdn brunch.

I haven’t done it for the last two years because I have been working (I work weekends normally).

This is an all-you-can-eat brunch that’s a little expensive for my liking. I have never celebrated another Mom on Mother’s Day (we normally do presents and maybe dinner that day or another for my Mom).

Sounds…expensive.

She and her family eat out a lot (her family goes out almost every week, and I go out almost every month with my family) and I try to budget it when I can.

I know I’m a little biased, though, as I don’t like eating brunch (breakfast is just cereal and I eat lunch leftovers the day before).

I’ve celebrated her Birthday and Christmas and I do want to support the future MIL.

Isn’t that enough?

The main problem is my fiancé says this is a new tradition they started last year and I don’t want to spend that kind of money every year on food that I won’t enjoy as much as her (Fiancé, and her whole family will come there).

Is there an acceptable way, like gifts or flowers I can give her instead? I am not a fan of all-you-can-eat foods in the mornings, but she has expressed her disappointment in me not wanting to come.

Any advice or ideas on supporting her mom on Mother’s Day? I want to make sure I’m doing the right thing, and there’s no option for buying a small salad or fruit bowl while being there to support her and her family (I will try to celebrate my mom later in the day too, rest assured!)

Reddit mostly leaned YTA, though not aggressively. A lot of commenters felt OP was focusing too heavily on the cost and menu instead of recognizing that family events aren’t always about personal enjoyment. To many people, attending a once-a-year Mother’s Day brunch for your future mother-in-law falls squarely into the category of “important relationship maintenance,” even if the food isn’t your favorite.

Several commenters also pointed out that marriage often means occasionally participating in traditions that matter more to your partner than to you personally. While OP clearly isn’t wrong for budgeting carefully or disliking brunch, people felt his fiancée likely views his refusal as a lack of effort or interest in bonding with her family.

That said, some commenters sympathized with not wanting expensive recurring obligations forced onto you without discussion. But overall, Reddit’s feeling was simple: sometimes you eat mediocre scrambled eggs for love.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a teen girl who went above and beyond for a friend, only to be berated about not spending enough money on a gift.

This person says it’s just one meal…

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In U.S. dollars, it’s literally not expensive at all.

Isn’t it nice to do things for your significant other’s family?

Turns out the real all-you-can-eat buffet was the serving of future in-law resentment.