April 6, 2026 at 8:55 pm

Woman Was Expected To Drive Hours And Bring Food For Massive Family Gatherings Several Times A Month, But She Finally Refused To Attend Easter

by Benjamin Cottrell

stressed woman at her desk

Pexels/Reddit

Sometimes family traditions come with a price tag no one talks about.

When one woman kept driving hours to attend large family gatherings while covering gas and food costs for everyone, she eventually said she wanted to scale back.

Her relatives didn’t take that very well at all.

Keep reading for the full story.

AITA for telling my family I’m not attending Easter celebration?

I (25F) have a very large family with roughly 10+ adults and 12+ children (1–13yo), not including close family friends who attend these family get-togethers as well.

My family gets together several times a month, and it is about a 1.5-hour commute for my young children (1 & 3yo) and me to make.

This is a huge commitment — both finance wise and time wise.

I’m then expected/asked to bring enough of a food/drink item for everyone, which can get quite expensive depending on what it is and how many people there are.

Her family is very good at guilting her into doing things her way.

Every time I try to back out of an event, I get shamed for not going, as the family wants to see my children and I’m “keeping them” from seeing family, even though it’s more of a financial issue.

But she starts to question whether this is really feasible for her.

I’m paying $50+ for gas each time I drive up, spending $100+ on food items, and of course taking the time to make the drive.

I tried to voice my want to cut down on the commute and only come for holidays, and I got ridiculed by everyone.

They never seem willing to travel to her though.

What upsets me is when I host a party and ask everyone to come down, they give me a hard time about the commute, etc.

Double standard?

So this time, she’s refusing to be guilt tripped.

Anywho, for Easter I’m putting my foot down in my refusal to attend, as my husband won’t be able to be present for it due to work.

I don’t have the funds to supply anything, and I just all around don’t want to go, as we’re not religious at all.

So AITA my family makes me out to be, or is my reasoning justified?

Sounds like either her family should come to her, or they should just deal with it.

What did Reddit think?

When you finally set boundaries, it quickly becomes clear how one-sided many relationships can be.

Screenshot 2026 04 02 at 11.30.32 AM Woman Was Expected To Drive Hours And Bring Food For Massive Family Gatherings Several Times A Month, But She Finally Refused To Attend Easter

At the end of the day, it’s her choice to make.

Screenshot 2026 04 02 at 11.31.07 AM Woman Was Expected To Drive Hours And Bring Food For Massive Family Gatherings Several Times A Month, But She Finally Refused To Attend Easter

Why not carve out a new holiday tradition of her own?

Screenshot 2026 04 02 at 11.31.46 AM Woman Was Expected To Drive Hours And Bring Food For Massive Family Gatherings Several Times A Month, But She Finally Refused To Attend Easter

Maybe these visits need to be a little more like low-pressure hangouts.

Screenshot 2026 04 02 at 11.32.27 AM Woman Was Expected To Drive Hours And Bring Food For Massive Family Gatherings Several Times A Month, But She Finally Refused To Attend Easter

Family wanted the visits, the food, and the long drive, but didn’t want to hear about the cost.

Sometimes the easiest way to solve a double standard is to just stop playing along.

If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.