A Mother’s Day Comment About a Dog With Cancer Leads to a Marriage Breaking Point

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Knowing when to keep your mouth shut is a skill, one that not everyone possesses.
A wife who had spent months nursing her sick dog through chemotherapy, cooking him homemade meals, and attending bi-weekly vet appointments largely on her own quietly hoped her husband would acknowledge her effort on Mother’s Day.
He did not. What he did instead was remind her, out loud, that “Mother’s Day was for real moms” — a statement delivered to a woman dealing with infertility who had just spent her savings keeping their dog alive.
She locked herself in the guest room. He went to the internet to find out if he was in the wrong.
Keep reading for the full story.
AITA for not getting my wife a Mother’s Day gift even though we don’t have any children?
I (36M) and my wife (32F) have been married for 4 years now.
Before this year, she never expected a Mother’s Day gift from me, as we don’t have children due to infertility issues — but after dinner she had a full-blown meltdown and now won’t talk to me.
Turns out, the subject of having children is a sore subject for her — and understandably so.
A little background: my wife and I don’t have any children of our own because of fertility issues — she has endometriosis.
After trying for a year, she decided having kids wasn’t a huge deal as long as we had pets, so I surprised her with a puppy.
I never cared for pets, but my wife grew up with dogs her whole life and her family gets pretty crazy about them.
As far as this family is concerned, these pets are basically family.
For example, her parents throw their dog a birthday party every year and invite their extended family and their dogs to their house for a huge celebration with cake (both human and dog), balloons, party hats — the whole nine yards.
But then tragedy struck.
Anyways, this past year our dog Rambo was diagnosed with lymphoma.
Due to his age (3 years), my wife pushed for us to do chemo, even though we don’t have pet insurance.
I told her if that’s what she wanted to do, then she had to cover all of his vet bills, and because my job is so demanding, she had to take time off to take him to his appointments.
The dog’s health has continued to be a source of conflict in their relationship.
These past few months she’s been a little extreme about him.
Taking him to his bi-weekly appointments, cooking him homemade meals, literally sitting on the floor spoon-feeding him — she spends all of her time, energy, and money on this dog.
Well, after dinner today she seemed more quiet than usual.
So finally, the conflict between them came to a head.
I asked her if I did something to upset her, and instead of talking to me, she went and sat on our kitchen floor next to Rambo, talking about how I don’t appreciate what “mommy does.”
I told her to stop referring to herself as “Mommy” because it’s weird and he’s just a dog.
That set her off, and she went on a tangent about how she’s been nursing this dog back to health and all I had to do was get her some flowers or cook her dinner — something to acknowledge her effort.
He soon realizes the two aren’t even close to being on the same page.
I couldn’t believe what she was saying — all this over a dog?
So I kindly reminded her that she’s the one who wanted to do chemo and waste all of her money and time on him.
She called me a jerk and locked herself and the dog in our guest room, and now she won’t speak to me.
I hate going to bed angry, but I don’t think I can do anything to get her to talk to me.
Now he’s wondering if he’s gone about this the wrong way.
Should I have bit my tongue and got her flowers?
If she is considering herself a “dog mom,” then why didn’t she act like this the past 3 years we’ve had Rambo?
In my mind, Mother’s Day is for real moms — so AITA?
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Guess he’s sleeping in the doghouse tonight.
If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a woman’s family who is trying to stop her from moving away for her husband’s job.
What did Reddit think?
This commenter thinks this guy is clearly in the wrong, but not for the reasons he thinks.

This guy may not even fully understand why his wife is so upset in the first place.

This is about so much more than “just a dog.”

This user seems annoyed that this guy just isn’t catching the hint.

Redditors seemed to understand what this husband clearly didn’t: there are multiple ways to be a mother. And even if she didn’t understand exactly what she was feeling, he could have handled the situation with more empathy.
A woman who could not have children, who got a dog to fill that space, who then spent months of her own money and time nursing that dog through cancer, asked for flowers on one hard day.
So instead of appreciating her enormous sacrifices, the best he had to offer her was a cruel reminder.
Some husband he is.

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