Starting a new job is stressful enough without feeling like you’re already being judged before you’ve had a chance to settle in. And when you’re still learning the basics, a little patience from the people training you can go a long way.

In this case, a woman who has just started her job as a general manager is only two days into training, and things are already feeling tense.

The trainer has been struggling with the systems, making mistakes, and occasionally expecting the trainees to know things they haven’t actually been taught.

Then an email arrived with feedback that sounded a bit passive aggressive. On day 2.

Read the full story below.

Already getting a passive aggressive email on day 2

I just got a new job as a general manager.

I’m currently on my second day of training with also the person I’ll be overseeing – we’re both new and training together.

Our direct manager is training us.

Our trainer has been doing her best, but we don’t have access to systems so then she’s all over the place going back and forth on Teams.

People from other teams she was using as examples were doing processes incorrectly so she would have to figure that out as we are sitting there trying to learn, and she also was making a ton of mistakes (she was editing someone else’s doc when she meant to edit ours).

But they are trying their best.

We’ve been asking questions and following along.

The other trainee with me even asked her a question and she goes, “didn’t we just talk about this”? and it wasn’t even something we had talked about, she just didn’t understand his question.

Red flag? She had also asked us to do something in the computer that we didn’t know how to do, and when we were confused and hesitant, goes:

“See this is why I need you guys to take notes on everything we talk about”, even though we BOTH didn’t know what she was talking about, AND she was wrong- we hadn’t talked about it at all.

But soon, the whole vibe shifted.

I also am not a notebook user for notes, I like everything digitally, so I’ve been taking notes on shorter notebook paper, and then planned to transfer it to my computer.

But overall I still thought training was going well and I was feeling confident.

Then, I get this email from her:

“Hi \_!
It’s been a great first two days of training. I wanted to check in and see how you’re feeling. We’ve covered a lot already, and I’d love to hear what has stood out to you so far.
As we continue tomorrow, I’d like you to bring a proper notebook for taking notes. It will help you keep everything organized and present a more polished look than using sticky notes. I’d also like to see you engage more, ask questions, and take a more active role in training. Since you’ll be leading this \_\_\_\_ and \_\_\_\_, I’d like to see you start leading by example. You don’t need to have all the answers yet, but I do want to see you lean in as you learn.
We’ll have a quick debrief before we start tomorrow, so please come prepared to share your thoughts on the training so far. I’m here to support you!
Thanks!”

Yikes.

I’m confused and annoyed as it’s literally been day 2!! I would get this if it had been a week or two, but not the second day!!

Or am I being too hard on her??

I just think it’s hypocritical in which she’s been kind of a mess and has been disorganized and unknowing of things, but then sends me this…

Does she even realize she’s being rude?

What did Reddit think?

A word of caution.

Yikes.

That’s a possibility.

Some solid advice.

Another reader chimes in.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about an employee who found a way around his company’s denial of company time to study for his Commercial Driver’s License.

Something to consider.

Of course a general manager is expected to take initiative, ask questions and be organized, so it’s not unreasonable for a trainer to communicate those expectations early on.

But the delivery matters too.

Maybe both have good intentions and just need to communicate better.