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An empty room isn’t automatically available.

This couple built their basement suite for one specific parent.

Then another relative assumed it belonged to her.

Urgency had a head-on collision with boundaries.

Read on for the full story.

AITAH For Letting My MIL Become Homeless?

I (35F) have been with my husband, Luke (35M), for 13 years.

We are married for 10 years.

About 8 years ago, we bought an old farmhouse and renovated it

We used my trust fund from my late father’s life insurance and our mutual savings account.

This woman had her basement renovated for her mom, Maddie.

My stepdad Ryan (67M) has a genetic condition and will likely need a nursing home soon. My mom, Maddie (63F), will then be alone.

So Luke and I renovated our basement into a mother-in-law suite for her.

Maddie and Ryan have seen the completed renovations, but they do not know that it was done for them.

But her husband’s mom, Debbie, moved back into town.

Last month, Luke’s mom, Debbie (60F), moved back to town.

She bounces between California and here, never with stable housing or income. She’s incredibly dependent upon her four children.

She has been staying at a local campground and a friend’s house.

Recently, a storm came through our area, ruining her tent, so Luke paid cash for her to stay for a week in a hotel.

Debbie assumed the basement was meant for her.

Last week, we were attending a family event.

My sister-in-law mentioned the mother-in-law suite in our basement, and Debbie assumed it was for her.

At the time, we did not know this conversation had even taken place. That was until Debbie showed up at our home on Saturday evening.

Luke explained that it was for his mother-in-law, not his mother.

So she blew up, called us ungrateful, and refused to leave until I called the sheriff’s department.

Maddie was grateful, but thought Debbie needed the place more.

Yesterday, Ryan and Maddie came to our home for our weekly lunch, and we told them about Debbie.

I explained why we had renovated the basement.

Maddie said that she was touched, but didn’t need to move in yet.

Instead, she suggested that we should allow Debbie to stay temporarily because she is in a more urgent need of a place to stay.

But the couple did not want Debbie to move in.

Luke and I discussed the situation, and I stated the honest truth: I’m selfish and do not want to live with her.

Luke agrees with me, but we are now torn.

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Debbie’s friend kicked her out, and our basement is empty, but again, it was intended for my mom. AITAH for refusing to let Debbie stay?

Are they wrong to refuse to let Debbie move in, or are they making the right decision?

Let’s read the reactions of other Reddit users to this story.

This user shares their personal thoughts.

This person gives their honest opinion.

Here’s a valid point from this person.

Short and straightforward.

And lastly, you’re not responsible for her, says this person.

The couple funded and designed the suite for the wife’s mother, while their unhoused relative arrived uninvited and refused to leave.

Her unstable situation is unfortunate, but an empty space doesn’t erase the homeowners’ right to choose their housemates.

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Author

Chris Allen