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Kindness at work isn’t always rewarded.

One employee at a small medical office spent months being patient with an older coworker, covering for her when she was confused or simply didn’t want to do her work. She was the only person in the office who never pushed back.

On one hectic morning, patients were arriving unexpectedly, the phones were ringing, and she was trying to set up a heart monitor.

Her coworker demanded an answer about the cost of a test, which was printed on a list right beside her, and raised her voice when the employee couldn’t follow.

For the first time in months, the employee lost her cool.

Keep reading for the full story.

being guilted by coworker

I work in a medical office, a very small one. I have a coworker who is an older lady. I was/am the only one in the office who is actually quite nice to her.

She does often pass off her work to me or others simply because she doesn’t want to do it, she’s confused, or whatever else.

One day, this employee walked headfirst into a particularly chaotic shift.

I had just walked in, was being told a patient needs help, was trying to figure out why there were two patients here that weren’t supposed to be, and phones were off the hook.

Right at 9 a.m.

Then her coworker starts to put even more pressure on her to do her job too.

She is asking me questions about a certain test and how much it would cost out of pocket.

Mind you, there is a list of out-of-pocket costs right next to her.

Her coworker then has the nerve to start getting nasty with her.

When I don’t understand her question, she raises her voice like I need to answer her right now, like what she is explaining is 100% clear and obvious.

She was stumbling over her words.

No one seemed to care that this employee already had her hands extraordinarily full.

This is in the middle of me trying to get a heart monitor ready to put on a patient who is waiting in the room. Certainly, a patient on the phone can wait a moment.

I get irritated and snap a bit, saying, “Look. Relax. I’m not going to argue.”

The two now get into a full-fledged argument.

“Oh, why are you yelling at me.” “You raised your voice with me.” “If you’re in a bad mood, don’t take it out on me.”

And she walks away. Then, she figures out the information on her own, which proves she is capable of doing so.

The employee reflects and realizes she lost her cool, so she tries to make it right.

Later, I go to apologize just to smooth everything over and move on. As I am apologizing, “I shouldn’t have snapped at you. I’m sorry.” “No, no, no. I don’t want to talk. Now I know who everyone really is in this office.”

I reiterate my apology and walk away.

She begins to resent how her coworker is treating her.

Now, I feel bad and sort of guilted/attacked. It’s like she only likes you if you’re 100% perfectly nice all the time, answer any and all questions for her, take things off her plate, and let her brag about herself/her kids to you.

This is the first time in the months she’s been here that I have ever had any negative reaction towards her. And now suddenly, I’m a bad person who must be shunned.

This sounds like textbook toxicity.

What did Reddit have to say?

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This employee could give herself a lot more grace.

Why not try to encourage her coworker to work a little more independently?

Sometimes you just have to match someone’s energy.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a delivery driver who, after being scolded for ignoring parking policies, decides to maliciously comply himself into some serious overtime.

Boundaries are extremely important in the workplace.

Months of patience don’t disappear in one outburst, even if the other person acts like they did.

Even when she did lose her cool, this employee still had the decency to apologize. Doesn’t she deserve a little grace for that?

Her coworker has two options ahead of her: either learn how to do her job independently, or play nice with the coworker who’s clearly trying to help her.

Being kind doesn’t mean being a doormat.

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Author

Benjamin Cottrell

Benjamin Cottrell | Assistant Editor, Internet Culture

Benjamin Cottrell is an Assistant Editor and contributing writer at TwistedSifter, specializing in internet culture, viral social dynamics, and the moral complexities of online communities. He brings a highly analytical, editorial voice to his reporting on workplace conflicts, malicious compliance, and interpersonal drama, with a specific focus on nuanced stories that lack an obvious villain.

As a published author of rhetorical criticism, Benjamin leverages his academic background in human communication to dissect and elevate viral social media threads. Instead of simply summarizing events, he provides readers with balanced, deep-dive commentary into why the internet reacts the way it does. In addition to his cultural reporting, he is an experienced fine art photography essayist and video game reviewer.

When he isn’t analyzing the latest viral debates, Benjamin is usually chipping away at his extensive video game backlog, hunting down the best new restaurants, or out exploring the city with a camera in hand.

Connect with Benjamin on Instagram and read more of his essays on Substack.