People Get Real About How They Deal With Their Loneliness
by Matthew Gilligan
I personally really enjoy spending time by myself and I can even go days without talking to another soul and I’ll be just fine.
But I also know that I’m weird and most folks out there tend to get pretty lonely.
And these AskReddit users went on the record and got real about how they deal with their loneliness.
Check out what they had to say.
Enjoy yourself.
“For me, I learned to be my own company.
At a certain point, I was using other people to get me to go and do things. Meet up for lunch! Let’s go see a movie! We can go explore a new place together!
Eventually, I figured out the loneliness looks a lot like boredom. I felt bad by myself because I never did anything. Once I learned to flip that, I would go and do things with myself as company all the time! Then things got really fun.
As naturally happens, that’s when I started to find myself in the company of like-minded individuals. These days, I don’t get as much time with myself as I would like—and honestly, I miss it a little bit.”
Time well spent.
“Educational videos/podcasts. Cooking. Journaling.
If I’m alone, then i’d like to work on improving the only person i’m in contact with – me.”
Use it to your advantage.
“Around 5 years ago I started to just do things on my own.
I used to never go out unless I could get someone else to come. Friends were always maybes and probablys, or we should do this some time, but our schedules were always different. It was too rare.
The stigma of doing things by yourself is bullshit. It’s great. Best decision I made. There’s so many things I would not have done if I didn’t start doing things by myself in the past 5 years.”
Feel the music.
“My Spotify is going all day long.
Sun rise to sun set. Live alone and work alone.
Last year raked in just under 120,000 minutes.”
Date night.
“I take myself out on dates. Fancy dinners are surprisingly affordable for one person.
It’ll usually be like $80-$100 that I’ll spend on myself for dinner and a cocktail or two at a super upscale restaurant.
I don’t need to spend money, though. Just going to a park or fair, maybe a cheap movie, with the idea of taking yourself on a date is very nice.”
The hard truth.
“After a while, more like years, you kind of go numb.
Always just a little bit sad, but its there all the time so I got used to it. That’s how it feels for me. People come and go from my life, they never can or want to stay there permanently.
I think I’m accepting that as a hard truth, because it doesn’t bother me so much anymore other than that little bit of sad.”
Stay busy.
“Exercise, meditation, proper sleep schedule and steady diet along with healthy hobbies and fun projects.”
Makes it easier.
“If it’s constant, you have to learn how to love yourself more.
Not easy at all, but doable. And when you have, the lonely days become minimal.
They’ll never completely go away, but it’ll make it easier.”
Join up.
“Join a class based gym and you’ll meet people.
I started Muay Thai a little bit of a year ago and have met some cool dudes.
Went to parties and outings I wouldn’t have gotten to if I hadn’t signed up.”
Get out there.
“Solo travel if you got the money, really helps you find peace with yourself and maybe you’ll learn to enjoy being alone.”
A new best friend.
“I moved 1300 miles away from home for work. For the next two years, I’m alone.
And at first it sent me into a deep spiral every night when I got home. Then I rescued an orange cat and honestly, as cliche as it sounds and is, she definitely saved me from getting worse and has made my every day, and life so much better and brighter.
Also, starting working out 5-6 days a week has helped a ton too. But mainly the cat. She’s the best.”
Get out there, fam! Most people will accept you if you want to be included.
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