It takes a truly horrible parent to just up and leave their family.

But leaving your family to go start another one? That takes a truly soulless person.

And it’s no easy feat for a child to have to interact with their parent’s new family, let alone be asked to assume care of them!

But unfortunately that’s exactly what happened to this user when her deadbeat Mom abandoned her affair baby just as she had abandoned her years ago.

Was she wrong to put her foot down and refuse to take care of her mother’s child?

Decide for yourself!

AITA for refusing to engage in discussions about my care for my mother’s youngest child with my maternal grandparents?

The background might be confusing but I’ll try to make it simple.

Seven years ago my mother left my family (dad, me, two brothers and younger sister) for months.

It was sudden, unexplained for like 3 months and my dad was really worried something had happened to her. But she told him she had found someone else she wanted to be with.

Dad only spoke to her once during those months and that was when he found this out.

Following that was nothing.

Even after leaving them without a word, her Mom had the nerve to come back and say she wanted things to go back to normal!

Almost a year later, maybe 10 months after she first up and went, she came back and told him she wanted us to be a family again and she regretted leaving him.

Dad refused to take her back. Mom then went MIA for another 2 months.

Then she came back and told us she’d originally left because she got pregnant with someone else’s child and hadn’t wanted us to know.

But once she realized Dad wouldn’t take her back regardless, she decided to take her kid back off whoever and told us all about him.

And after the countless betrayals he had suffered, Dad was not about to let this be an easy separation…

My parents divorce was messy.

Dad had to do a DNA on the kid, who isn’t his son, and he also had to legally sever his parental responsibility because he and mom were married.

This fact made him the de-facto father and mom tried to put him on the birth certificate. But she had him under her maiden name so it was a mess.

But Dad severed any rights or responsibilities and he never interacted with mom’s son or agreed to be responsible for him.

In the current day, she and her family understandably wanted nothing to do with their Mother….

I’m now 20f and my siblings are 17m, 15m and 14f.

We did not have a relationship with our mother after she left our family.

We do not have a relationship with her youngest and we only saw him once, very briefly, when he was a baby.

My mom left again, leaving her youngest behind. His father is unknown. DNA didn’t find him.

My maternal grandparents were denied the opportunity to take him and my dad was asked if he would, and he said no, then I was asked, and I said no, so he went to a foster family.

And even though her grandparents didn’t want to assume responsibility, they had no problem demanding that OP’s Dad do just that!

This happened 4 months ago.

My maternal grandparents decided to ask my dad to raise their grandson as his son and raise him as our sibling.

But my dad put my foot down and said no.

After he put his foot down they turned to me and told me I could do it, with their financial help.

They gave me the sob story of he’s innocent, he’s so young, he doesn’t have anyone else, he’s miserable in foster care, and that he should know us all and have a relationship with us.

I said no. I told them I do not care. He is not my responsibility and I feel nothing for him.

After this they asked me to sit down and discuss care options for him.

But she was having none of it, and told them that the conversation was over.

I said no. I told them it has nothing to do with me.

They argued that it does, they argued that he’s my brother whether I want him to be or not.

I told them I do not care and he can stay in foster care because I won’t raise him.

They tried shaming me for my coldness and I brushed it off.

They also shamed me for not seeking any visits with him so he can get to know me.

They said it would be a good influence on my younger siblings, who also want nothing to do with him.

AITA?

It’s terrible that his Mom left him, but she left all of her other siblings too!

Reddit said that just because the poor boy was innocent doesn’t make him her burden to shoulder.

This user pointed out that 20 years old was hardly old enough to take care of a child on her own.

And many people said they needed to turn their pressuring onto the person that abandoned him in the first place!

Finally, this user said that it wasn’t her choice to have a child, so it wasn’t her responsibility to take care of them.

And the worst Mom award goes to…..

Definitely not this girl.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.