His Girlfriend Won’t Stop Pressuring Him To Tell Her About His Scars. Now She’s Offended By His Unwillingness To Share And He Doesn’t Know What To Do.
by Ashley Ashbee
There is a reason for trigger warnings and “Viewer discretion advised.”
Trauma is a tricky thing and many, if not most people, want to control their exposure to their trauma.
That’s what the boyfriend in this story wanted to do, but his girlfriend disagrees. Check out what’s been going on between them.
AITA for not telling my GF about my Scars
Ever since my girlfriend and I first hooked up, she has been very curious and obsessive about my scars.
I have around 30 of them that cover my body.
He has his reasons for keeping their cause(s) private.
Anytime someone or asks about them I come up with a funny joke to hint that I’m not comfortable with telling them and get them to move on.
But my girlfriend won’t.
Lately she’s been asking nonstop to the level of that I finally told her I had no intention of telling her for the foreseeable future and that she should stop asking.
It seems nothing will get her to stop pressuring him.
She got very upset saying I don’t trust her or feel comfortable enough with her to be vulnerable and that it hurts her.
I can understand that feeling but I have not told someone for five years and last time I did they used it against me.
I told her I do trust her but it is true that I’m not comfortable enough yet to discuss that past trauma.
AITA?
Here’s what folks are saying.
An important point. The visibility of scars does not mandate you to disclose how you got them.
This is a good point. She sees it as a trust issue, but it isn’t. It’s a trauma issue and that requires patience.
He didn’t have those experiences, so why would it be traumatic for him to talk about them? It’s not the same.
It seems to be a particularly North American thing. English and German people are known for keeping things very private.
This seems like a good solution. She thinks it’s a trust thing, but it isn’t.
Be patient!
If you liked that story, check out this one about a woman who went on a date with somebody who was 10 years older than her. Find out what happened!
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