In order to lose weight, a lot of people have to make big changes to their eating habits.

In today’s story, one man eats less than he used to, but his wife is still cooking as much as she always has.

His refusal to eat large portions is causing a problem in their marriage.

Let’s see how the story unfolds…

AITA for refusing to eat all of my wife’s food?

So I (37m) and my wife (35f) are cooling down from an argument right now based around me telling her point blank to make less food in the future or I’m going to continue not eating it.

The backstory is pretty simple and nothing to the point of threatening our marriage or anything.

I’m getting up in years and as a basketball player and these knees are starting to go.

I had eventually reached around 89kg (196lbs) at 176cm (5’9) tall around the tail end of Covid.

I knew I had to make a change and at least get down to my pre-Covid weight (around 74kg, or 163lbs).

Now I’m actually all the way down to 70kg!

I’m happy with my progress and I’m set on making this my new normal moving forward until old age and beyond.

His wife isn’t responding well to his weight loss.

But my wife isn’t exactly thrilled I’ve shed all the weight. There aren’t love handles for her to play with anymore.

Most devastating for her is I don’t eat nearly as much as I used to.

We trade off cooking duties every day and when it’s me, I usually make just enough.

But when she cooks?

There is always enough food for another full plate of food.

His wife is taking his refusal to eat seconds personally.

My wife is tiny so she can’t eat it, and I’m now a dude who doesn’t eat it, either.

I always say we can save it and have it for dinner the next day again (I don’t eat breakfast and lunches are provided by my work), and while that worked for awhile eventually the leftovers just went in the bin and she’d ask me to cook something new instead.

Although it’s been fine more or less she doesn’t hold back on commenting.

To her, men should be eating seconds or thirds.

It’s just the Japanese way to her (she’s Japanese and we live in the country), and she always recalled her father enthusiastically asking for seconds and thirds.

She’s feeling more and more ashamed that her husband doesn’t like her cooking.

He does love his wife’s cooking.

But I do! Her cooking is fantastic. And I eat as much as I can when she makes it!

It’s just she makes too much now.

We’ve had talks about her portion sizing, but it’s always gotten back around to letting her cook her way.

He knew he said the wrong thing to his wife.

This all boiled over earlier tonight when she asked if I wanted a second serving of karaage (a delicious fried chicken) and I said, “Nah, I’m way too full.”

In which she countered with, “Are you just going to throw away all this chicken then? That’s so wasteful.”

I knew I was giving the wrong response immediately, as the words left my mouth, but still I said it.

“YOU are wasting all of this chicken. I told you to make less food. I’ve been telling you for months. I don’t see you eating the chicken, either. You are the one wasting money and time making all this extra food that I won’t eat, and that’s not going to change.”

He wonders if he’s wrong for not overeating to please his wife.

Now she’s in bed after a cry, and nothing from me gave her any comfort.

And I’m downstairs writing this.

I know my response was wrong in the moment, but have I been an jerk about this entire weight loss journey, at least as it pertains to my wife’s cooking?

Should I have just sucked it up and ate all of her food?

His wife doesn’t seem to get it.

It’s not about the food itself, it’s about not wanting to overeat.

Let’s see how Reddit responded…

This reader thinks the wife might have an ulterior motive.

Another reader called the wife “insecure.”

This reader believes cooking too much is a common Asian thing.

This reader offers a potential compromise.

Another reader has a suggestion about what to do with the extra food.

I’d be happy to eat the leftovers!

But this guy has been more than clear about his position.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.