A man’s frustration grows when his fiancée plans a birthday party for her son, which backfires when no one shows up.

After the event, he speaks up about what the child really wanted, leading to tension with his fiancée.

Is he overstepping, or is his perspective valid?

AITA for speaking on behalf of my fiancée’s child?

My fiancée  (29F) and I (28M) have been together for two years.

For the most part, things are really good.

She has a son (8M) from a previous relationship.

The dad isn’t involved.

Together we’re our own little family unit.

The issue is over the son’s recent birthday party.

He’s having trouble in school and has been made a target.

My fiancée and I have both talked to the school.

They give the same lip service.

I suggested changing schools, but my fiancée says no school’s perfect.

Sounds like the school’s motto is “We tried nothing, and we’re all out of ideas.”

The son wanted a small birthday party. Nothing major.

He just wanted to spend the day with us at a park.

My fiancée instead made him invite his entire class and planned a big day.

Not a single child came.

It was just us with trays of food and a bunch of birthday decorations.

Waiting was the worst part.

He’s had some rough days, but I’ve never seen him so down.

He was humiliated.

It bothered me, and I felt something needed to be said.

Sometimes keeping it simple really is the best way.

My fiancée and I had a talk that night, and I stated that I thought we should’ve listened to what the son actually wanted instead of pushing a big party.

She believed that I should be supporting her and said it’s not my place to interfere with matters involving her son.

There was an emphasis on “her son.”

Our talk turned into a big argument.

Her comment was a blow.

I realize I’m not the bio dad, but I’m the constant male figure in his life.

We’ve grown close.

Oof, that “her son” line stings.

I’m the one who has those serious talks with him, I’m someone he asks for advice, who drops him off at school and picks him up.

I help him with homework, engage in his interests, show up on outings, etc.

I might not be his bio dad, but don’t treat me like some uninvolved bystander.

My fiancée was always popular in school. She doesn’t relate.

I know what it’s like to be unwanted in a room.

I know what it’s like to hate being in the school hall.

My fiancée just believes he needs to try harder to assert himself.

There’s still some tension between my fiancée and myself.

Thanksgiving was awkward, which is ironic since it’s supposed to be about thankfulness.

The son has started to notice the rift and asked about it.

My fiancée feels I overstepped.

I feel differently. AITA?

Now, he’s wondering if he’s the one at fault.

But don’t worry, Reddit is on his side.

This person doesn’t know what the mom was thinking.

This person is impressed with his listening skills (and not so much Mom’s).

This person thinks he might get the A+ in parenting while Mom gets an F.

Guess he’s learning the hard way that sometimes being a “father figure” means taking the backseat.

But still getting called out when you don’t buckle in.

If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.