Mom Thinks It’s Best To Keep The Child Custody Arrangement Consistent, But Dad Wants To Make A Major Change To The Schedule
by Jayne Elliott
Child custody can be hard on everyone involved.
Parents might miss out on important events in their kids’ lives, and kids have to constantly pack to go back and forth between their parents’ houses.
In today’s story, a mom is venting about the child custody arrangement and how her ex is pushing to change it.
She thinks this is a bad idea.
Let’s see why she’s so set against giving in to her ex’s wishes about the schedule.
AITA for refusing to adjust our custody schedule for my ex’s job?
My ex-husband and I share custody of our five kids (ages 8–16) on a week on/week off schedule, as per our divorce decree.
This arrangement has worked well, especially since I started my own massage therapy business last year.
However, my ex frequently demands to switch to a two weeks on/two weeks off schedule because he needs to travel out of state for work.
He says it’s too expensive to travel every weekend.
To clarify, it’s not a requirement for him to travel two weeks at a time, he’s allowed to travel every other week, it just costs him more to travel four times a month instead of two.
Here’s her financial situation…
For context, his income is four times mine.
I make about $30k a year, and he pays $730 a month in child support and $550 in spousal support, though the spousal support will end in 1.5 years.
However, I use the spousal support on the kids anyway to help cover their expenses.
Finding and paying for last-minute childcare adds up quickly.
Her ex doesn’t seem to understand that she needs a consistent schedule.
I already work fewer hours on the weeks I have the kids, but I can’t make up for it by working more hours on my off weeks, my body simply can’t handle it.
So every time he changes the plan, it disrupts my client schedule and forces me to either reschedule appointments (potentially losing clients) or find (and pay for) last minute childcare.
I’ve told him I need consistency for both my business and the kids, but he argues I should be more flexible because his job is demanding.
The kids don’t like the arrangement either.
On top of that, the kids don’t like the two weeks on/two weeks off arrangement.
They are struggling as is with the week on/week off.
They prefer to be with me, but there’s nothing I can do about that.
The two oldest begged to start therapy because of the stress their father causes them, so I got them into therapy.
Now the third oldest is begging to start therapy too.
She’s worried about her kids.
I worry that the constant changes are detrimental to their mental health and overall stability.
He doesn’t believe in mental health and doesn’t want them in therapy, but I digress.
I finally put my foot down and told him I won’t keep adjusting the schedule.
Now he’s calling me selfish and says I’m not considering how hard he works to provide for the kids.
I feel like I’m just protecting my business and the kids’ mental health and stability.
AITA?
That does sound like a stressful situation for everyone involved.
The kids’ mental health should definitely be a priority.
Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this story…
This person would say the same line over and over again.
The ex is selfish.
Going to court might be a good idea.
Another reader suggests court and therapy.
He should really be paying more in child support.
It’s probably best to let the judge decide.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t sound like Dad will do the right thing on his own.
If you liked this post, you might want to read this story about a teacher who taught the school’s administration a lesson after they made a sick kid take a final exam.
Categories: STORIES
Tags: · aita, child custody, custody, divorce, ex-husband, mental health, picture, reddit, top

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