When you are living with other people, it is great if you can be friends as well as roommates.

What would you do if your two roommates became very close and started excluding you from various activities?

That is what happened to the woman in this story, so when they invited her to a birthday party, she decided that she didn’t want to go.

Should she go to the party anyway? Let’s read the story.

AITA for declining my roommate’s birthday invite?

I live with 2 other people.

When I moved in, we started getting really close and hung out together all the time.

We would cook together, watch films, go out and do a bunch of silly stuff.

About a year ago, these two started excluding me in their activities.

That is pretty rude.

From little stuff such as going for a simple walk around the block to going to a concert of an artist I openly talked about, without me.

Of course, they are not obliged to ask me to join every activity they do, but it was still very random and suspicious how fast I was excluded, for no particular reason.

Long story short, I confronted them, we (more or less) talked it out, they apologized and started to hang out again.

(Mind you, I specifically asked them if there is anything I did that may have made them feel uncomfortable, anything that I can do to better myself as a friend, and they completely denied any wronging from my side).

She spent more time with one of her roommates when the other roommate was away.

Now, for 6 months one of them (Roomie A) left to work for a company outside the country.

Me and the other roomie (Roomie B) got along pretty well, watched shows together, had chits chats and so on.

I would often mention how nice it would be if the other roomie was here as well, and we all kind of started making plans for when we are united.

Guess what?

Ever since roomie A came back, everything is happening again.

I am fully ignored and excluded.

This is good at least.

I am very positive that there is no malicious intent, but rather the fact that I don’t have the same interests as they do and that’s okay.

But it still hurt.

I am not the type of person to confront again and try to be their friend, so I started to completely ignore them and move on.

I have not been saying hello, I have been very distant, dry and probably very passive-aggressive in my behavior as they are basically glued together whether it is in the living room or the kitchen.

I wonder what is going on.

For a few months now roomie B and I have not exchanged any words other than a dry “hi” or some cleaning complaints in the group chat (they themselves and their entire family has unfollowed me on socials as well…).

Roomie A sometimes talks to me when I see them in the kitchen, and we talk about vague topics and work related stuff.

She wasn’t expecting this.

A few days ago I actually received a message in which roomie A invited me to their birthday and I declined, because there is no way that after so many months of nothing but pure tension, I will show up and act like nothing is going on.

I cannot and will not act like everything is fine.

So now, roomie A has also slowly stopped to talk to me.

I am totally fine with losing those friendships.

Apparently this has happened before with others.

This definitely seems like a weird situation.

I strongly believe that this is a very immature situation that could’ve been avoided by communicating early and directly, I just don’t want to be the one to bring it up AGAIN, especially now that it is a bit too late in my opinion.

So yeah it all comes down to the one question: Am I wrong for avoiding any further gatherings with them, resulting in more distance and tension between us?

AITA?

It sounds like maybe the friendships have run their course and it is time to move on.

Let’s see what the people in the comments on Reddit say about it.

This person says they just aren’t friends.

This person says that she is being hostile.

This is a difficult situation.

This commenter says she has zero obligation to pretend they are friends.

This person says she has already told them once, no need to drag it on.

These ladies need to grow up.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.