Extended families have to learn to get along for the sake of the parents.

But in this woman’s case, it didn’t quite work out that well, since both her stepsister and her stepmom keep criticizing her personality and decisions.

But this time, she’s wondering if she really did do something wrong.

Let’s analyze the situation.

AITA for not saying goodbye in person to my step-sister before she left the country?

My parents have been divorced since 2011 and my dad remarried in 2014.

I’ve known my stepmom since I was 12 years old and in a lot of ways I’d say she’s like a second mother to me.

We say I love you to each other and have our own relationship.

That sounds lovely. But things were about to change because of her stepsister.

However, I don’t get along with my stepsister.

I met her when I was 12 years old and she was 30.

When I was a kid (I’m now 24) I lived in her old room which caused a lot of jealousy.

She would also constantly talk badly about me to her stepmom, saying I was weird, spoiled, etc.

I was a child so I was most definitely not perfect but like… I still don’t get this lol.

That was very immature of her. But things were okay, until now.

It’s been a while and she has a husband and son now.

We aren’t the best of friends or anything but it’s no longer actively hostile, and things are mostly pleasant.

This past Christmas, my stepsister came to visit (she lives in Germany).

Things were mostly fine, and my step-mom mentioned to me she hoped that we could all spend time together and get along considering the bumpy past my step-sister and I had.

Everything goes fine until the last day.

Things reached a boiling point really fast.

I was aware my step-sister was leaving, but I didn’t know what time of day her flight was.

I already had plans to meet my mom along with my blood-related sister (this was the only time I would be able to see her while I was in town) to see a movie together.

So I said “If I don’t see you, goodbye and nice to see you!” to my step-sister the night before.

I also send a text before the movie.

That was nice given the context of their relationship… But apparently not nice enough.

We go see the movie and when I get out of the movie I have several text messages from my stepmom asking where I am as my stepsister is leaving.

I respond explaining: ‘Sorry, I didn’t see these because I was in a movie, I was with my mom. I texted/said goodbye.’

My stepmom doesn’t reply.

I get home kind of late and my dad lets me in, and things seem a little weird.

Apparently, while I was gone, there was a fight.

Yet another argument involving her and her stepsister.

It was about some other stuff, but it boiled down to my stepmom saying: “Well, I guess blood really does run thicker than water, huh?” to my dad.

She got incredibly angry about the fact my sister and I were not there to say goodbye to my step-sister.

The fight escalates and she also goes on to say “Just go back to your (my mom’s name)! go back and take your girls with you!”

My dad says that last bit was confusing because they never really talk about my mom.

That was uncalled for. But she is unsure if she was really in the wrong.

This is all told from my dad’s perspective so who knows if it’s true or if it’s incredibly watered down.

Anyway, all of this to say: Should I have made more of an effort to be there on the day to say goodbye to my step-sister?

It clearly was pretty important to my step-mom.

From my perspective, I had already said goodbye and I wouldn’t have really cared if my step-sister hadn’t been present to say goodbye to me before I left town.

But I still feel bad it caused so many issues and I wonder if there’s something more I could have done.

AITA?

It seems both her stepsister and her stepmom have a grudge against her.

This is unhealthy.

Let’s see how Reddit feels about this.

A reader shares their thoughts.

This commenter has an interesting take.

Yup.

Exactly.

Another reader chimes in.

That’s unfair to her.

They are two adults who were on good enough speaking terms.

Ironically, this petty argument might discourage them from seeing each other more often.

If you enjoyed this story, check out this post about a daughter who invited herself to her parents’ 40th anniversary vacation for all the wrong reasons.