Divorces are a messy business.

Especially when kids are involved.

But in this story, one breakup might lead to another because the ex is still in the picture.

Let’s see who gets custody of NTA here…

AITAH for thinking to breakup with my partner because he loathes expensive gifts for my son from my ex?

I am 36f and have a son 12m with my ex.

My ex is a surgeon and makes good money.

We divorced when my son was four, as he was never available.

I work a government job and make decent money.

I have majority custody and his father gets like every other weekend.

Sounds like this dad isn’t around a lot. How does he compensate for his absence?

I get child support, which I mostly use for son’s wellbeing, savings and activities.

Also my son visits his father anytime and I never stop him.

We live five kilometres from each other, and the house where I stay is from my ex in-laws.

It’s mine with the legal condition that it can only pass to my son.

Also it helps me paying mortgage of my own home, which I bought during the divorce and it is covered by rent.

So it has been huge help in life.

Not seeing the problem so far. But there must be one upcoming…

I started seeing a man, let’s say Denis (40m), three years back and we got serious.

He moved in with me six months back with his two children, 14f and 10m.

We are planning to get married.

You know what the say about plans… what’s the hitch with them getting hitched?

He is a widower and has a great job himself.

But, the issue is, my ex makes way more.

And my son studies at an international school.

Step-kids study at an English medium private school too.

But my son’s school is a very different level, and Denis wanted me to either take my son out or pay for his children’s school.

Which I refused.

We fought, but sorted out things.

It is unaffordable and we can’t live a decent lifestyle if we pay for it, or better to save for their future.

Inequality is tough to handle. How else are these kids treated differently?

Recently my ex took our son to Europe trip, which made Denis and his kids feel bad.

Also my ex keeps giving expensive gifts to my son which I can’t stop.

I can’t just gift $2000 USD worth of gifts to each kid

I called my y ex to keep gifts at his home, because they’re causing fights here.

But he told me to buzz off . My son shared things with the other two kids.

But they started ruining it.

You didn’t buy it, you can’t break it. But surely this can’t all be about toys?

He stopped doing it.

Also my son has his own bathroom attached. Whereas other two kids share a common bathroom.

It is also another issue, and when I asked my son to switch rooms with my step-daughter, he said no.

I didn’t force the issue.

But Denis wanted my step-daughter to get the room. Note: Step-children have their own rooms. But common bathroom.

This daily argument is ruining my mind. I love Denis and I want to marry him.

But his expectations from me are too much, and I can’t stop my ex from gifting things and trips.

My son is the only heir to my ex, and he doesn’t care.

Sounds like nobody is respecting boundaries here. What else does divorced dad have up his sleeve?

Denis and me can afford good cars but no BMWs.

My son will get such a car on his 18th bday from his dad, and I see more fights later.

I asked my friend, should I breakup?

She said you can’t let your ex dictate your relationship and need to spine up.

And try to make my son live normal life style like other two kids.

Yeah, sounds like ex-husband and Denis are at war. Should this mom be caught in the middle?

I don’t know what to do. I want one more child and Denis is the perfect man to share my family goals. He has his shortcomings.

But I feel I will be bad mother if I stay with him. I want to change him.

But he is not understanding.

This is a tough situation for everyone.

What do our comments think OP should do?

This person says Denis is a menace.

This poster agrees and thinks Denis needs to “spine up,” not her.

Someone else says, everyone can do better.

Here’s another vote for Dennis being a menace… and a mooch.

One user calls entitled person and AH.

This mom doesn’t know if she should “man up” or “man down.”

But either way, she’d be better off alone.

If you enjoyed that story, read this one about a mom who was forced to bring her three kids with her to apply for government benefits, but ended up getting the job of her dreams.