She’s pulling 16-hour shifts, sleeping on the couch, and surviving on fumes.

He’s coughing, chilling with his iPad, and demanding a spotless kitchen—without lifting a finger.

When he guilt-tripped her for not cleaning his mess, she started wondering: Is she a jerk for refusing to scrub up after her not-so-bedridden boyfriend?

Let’s read the whole story.

AITAH for not cleaning up after my boyfriend when he’s ill?

I live with my boyfriend, who has been sick for the past week (since last Wednesday, and today is Tuesday). He’s been coughing constantly, though not to the point of vomiting or sleeping all day.

He’s been off work, mostly lounging and watching videos on his iPad.

Because of his coughing, I’ve been sleeping on the sofa since it’s been hard for me to fall asleep with the noise (though I understand it’s not his fault), so I’m extra tired this week.

She’s been working a lot.

I haven’t used the kitchen since Sunday (and left it spotless afterwards), and I tend to work long shifts with late hours.

Yesterday (Monday), I got home at 1am after a 16-hour shift and commute and immediately went to bed.

Today (Tuesday), I returned at 9pm after a 12-hour shift and commute.

I can see what’s gonna happen next…

When I got home today, I had only 10-15 minutes to relax before he came out of the bedroom and told me to stop whatever I was doing because the kitchen needed to be cleaned.

I was confused because I hadn’t used the kitchen, but the counters were covered with a couple of days’ worth of dirty dishes, cutlery, pots and pans, and appliances like the rice cooker and velvetiser that hadn’t been cleaned.

He explained that, while the mess was his, he couldn’t clean it because he didn’t want to and said it would involve too much bending over.

Excuse me?

He needed it cleaned immediately because he planned to use the kitchen tomorrow, adding that if I said I was too tired from working 12-16 hours, it wouldn’t get cleaned until the weekend since I’d be working late all week and I’d just be tired every evening.

He also mentioned that he’d already run several loads of the dishwasher today, though he agreed most of the dishes were his (except for a couple of bowls of cereal I had already cleaned).

I told him I’d just come back from a long shift and wasn’t expecting to spend my limited free time cleaning.

He said, “It won’t take that long to clean,” and after I reiterated, he responded, “Just know that you’re choosing not to help me. I’m sick,” before going back to the bedroom to watch more of his videos.

The guilt trip is wild.

While he’s usually fairly clean, this situation rubbed me the wrong way (and now he’s annoyed with me).

My main issue is that, in this case, his illness doesn’t seem severe enough to justify not cleaning up after himself. He’s still able to cook but doesn’t clean as he goes. If he were bedridden or extremely sick, I’d understand, but this feels different.

What bothers me most is when I come home after long shifts and am told I need to clean a mess that isn’t mine.

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I don’t think he understands how exhausting it is to have so little free time, especially since he works a 9-5 job from home, where he typically finishes just before 5pm and has 6-7 hours each evening to do as he pleases. Coming home after a 12-16 hour day, only to be asked to clean, feels incredibly frustrating.

AITA?

Reddit commenters weren’t coughing up any sympathy for him.

This person says demanding a cleanup from someone who just walked in from a 12-hour day? That’s not illness—it’s entitlement.

This person says if he’s well enough to use the rice cooker, he’s well enough to rinse it out.

This person says he doesn’t even HAVE to cook when he’s sick!

If he wants the kitchen cleaned so badly, he should try bending over backward…with gratitude.

If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.